Decluttering doesn’t have to be overwhelming… just ask yourself if you love it or use it. If not, it’s probably time to lose it!
I’m a big fan of decluttering (not just organizing).
In fact, even if I have the space to store something, I probably won’t keep it unless we regularly use it or we just love it.
I’ve been a “declutterer” for as long as I can remember, and in over 30 years of life, I’d need to really think hard to come up with something I regret decluttering (pretty good odds if you ask me!)
Of course, if we have a use for an item or if it’s just something we love, I’ll make the space for it. But if not, it’s gone. Period!
We often make decluttering into a monumentally overwhelming project that’s way too easy to put off until we “have more time” (news flash, you’ll never have more time).
Instead of feeling overwhelmed by big decluttering projects, I challenge you to ask yourself 2 simple questions as you go through your daily and weekly routines — in your home, in your office, in your car, in your purse, in your closet, etc.
The 2 Questions:
1. Is this something I/we LOVE?
2. Is this something I/we USE? (or plan to use in the near future)
If you can’t answer yes to at least one of those questions, there’s a good chance you can donate, sell, or trash the item with very few consequences.
See how easy that was?
Love it or Lose it Examples:
Obviously, if you’re actively USING something, it’s easy to justify keeping it. However, if you just love something, the decision-making might be a bit more challenging.
Here are a few examples of “love it” or “lose it” scenarios, and how I’d handle them.
- The giant pile of coloring books no one uses and you constantly trip over = LOSE IT (or maybe just keep one book)
- The backup toaster you’re saving “just in case” but never use = LOSE IT
- The magazines you enjoy flipping through for recipe inspiration = LOVE IT (keep a few in a basket in your kitchen, declutter when the basket gets too full)
- The bin of baby clothing you’re saving just because it brings you joy = LOVE IT (keep one bin of your favorites and donate the rest)
- The newish shoes your child refuses to wear because they are uncomfortable = LOSE IT (you could sell them to recoup a bit of the cost)
- The book you already read and could get from the library anytime = LOSE IT
- The Christmas dishes you love using in December and have space to store the rest of the year = LOVE IT
- The pants that are 2 sizes too small and make you feel bad every time you try them on and they still don’t fit = LOSE IT
Decluttering decision guidelines:
If 2 questions feel a little TOO simplistic for you, here are a few more steps you can go through as you declutter.
1. Be honest.
If you haven’t used something in years and don’t particularly love it, just toss it or donate it and move on.
If you use the item once a year and you have space to store it, then keep it. But don’t try to rationalize ways you might be able to use it in 5 years… and don’t try to justify storing it just because you can squeeze it into the back corner of your son’s closet.
2. Assess the ease of replacement.
If it’s relatively inexpensive and readily available, lose it now, and don’t look back! If it’s a pricey heirloom or irreplaceable antique (that you love), consider ways you might repurpose the items to USE in your everyday life instead of just storing it (here are a bunch of practical ways I’ve repurposed family heirlooms).
3. Evaluate needed space.
Large bulky items have less chance of survival around the Dekker house because I’m not willing to “waste” so much storage space on something we don’t love or use regularly.
However, I’ll sometimes hold onto smaller items if I have a convenient storage space AND if I can honestly see myself using them in the near future.
That said, I won’t automatically hang onto something just because it’s small if we really don’t love it or plan to use it.
4. Get a second opinion.
If you struggle to make executive decisions, ask a friend to help. They won’t be as emotionally attached to your things and can offer more practical suggestions.
5. Don’t try to predict the future.
Yes, you might regret decluttering something, and you might have a twinge of guilt if you sell or donate certain items… but you might not! In the meantime, someone else will be thrilled to find your cast-offs and you’ll enjoy extra space in your home — win-win!
As an added bonus, you could probably use your donations as a tax write-off! Simply ask for a donation receipt and use a tool such as Taxcaster to factor the write-off into your tax return.
I can’t give you a definite “yes” or “no” on every questionable item in your home, but if you want my opinion I’d say if you don’t LOVE it, and you don’t USE it, you should LOSE it!
Oh, and if you’re the type to make excuses, read this post. 😉
What will you declutter first?
Catherine says
Hi Andrea! Gifts are my achilles heel in decluttering. I feel SO guilty decluttering gifts I don’t love or use. I’m worried my family members or close friends will realize I got rid of their thoughtful gifts. Any perspectives that could help me? ❤️
Andrea says
haha — you and probably 75% of the population 🙂 Gifts are tricky when it comes to decluttering, especially if the giver is very sentimental or a “guilt tripper”.
personally, if you’ve had the gift for a couple of years, I think the friend or relative will probably not even think about it anymore (can you remember gifts you gave to people years ago?) I don’t know… maybe I’m just forgetful!
Also, if they give it to you, they should also be able to let you do with it whatever you want — including, giving it away.
I totally feel your pain, and I understand the guilt you feel, but if the gifts are causing clutter in your home and/or if you feel resentful of them, it’s probably best to donate or sell them and enjoy the extra space.
Keep in mind, I’m not super sentimental and don’t often have an emotional attachment to things (so consider that when reading my advice). Ultimately, it’s YOUR home, and your space… so I don’t think you should feel guilty making decisions about how you use your space.
Toni says
Some people I know take the box of decluttered gifts with them when visiting a friend in a nearby state. This friend, who understands the dilemma, then takes the box to a thrift store. Your gift givers probably won’t shop there.
Andrea says
This is a fantastic idea — thanks so much for sharing!
Catherine says
Thanks for taking the time to respond, Andrea! This helps! I agree that I don’t remember most gifts I give after a while and that it’s not too much to ask for me to feel comfortable in my own home.
Great tip, Toni.
Rebecca G says
I just donated 6 large bags of clothing between my girls and I – many I loved AND would wear again, many that still fit – but the laundry was such a huge burden. I just closed my eyes and put the bags into the donate bin so I wouldn’t second-guess anything at the last minute. 🙂 It’s been two weeks and the tidy house without clothing and laundry in various stages of clean piled everywhere has been worth it all. I have to admit, it was hard making the decision and parting with each item, but ultimately I haven’t been able to recall any of the specific items I thought and stressed about parting with. Once it is gone, it is literally gone from your mind despite all the second-guessing. Just take that step and unburden yourself from the weight of having too much!
Andrea says
yes — I can totally relate. We have room in our closets for more clothing, and we often find CHEAP clothing that we really like at thrift stores… but we don’t need it and the laundry is crazy with too much stuff.
Thanks so much for sharing your positive experience with a big declutter!
Sue says
We down-sized from a large house with about 40 years of accumulation to a small apartment. I can honestly say that I do not miss anything that we purged!! I did struggle with sentimental items, but had no room to keep them. So I took photos of some the things I wanted to remember. No regrets!!! Another tip…ask people in your church or friendship/relatives circle if they know someone who needs your stuff. It helps so much that things you love are going to someone who you know will appreciate them.
Andrea says
This is so great to hear — I’m thrilled you shared it in the comments. Also, how amazing that you were able to declutter so much stuff! I’m sure cleaning and caring for your small apartment is so much faster and easier than your large home!
Toni says
Go through your things now, while you have the mind to do it. Your loved ones will NOT appreciate having to do the work you should have done long ago.
Andrea says
yes, exactly. My grandma actually went through much of her stuff about 7 years ago (after my grandpa died) and had children and grandchildren all come and pick what they wanted. Now, she has dementia and can’t remember anything or anyone so it was such a great thing that she decluttered and “purged” her things several years ago.
Roberta says
We have put our house on the market and will move to a smaller house if it sells. I have spent the last month decluttering and “it feels so good”! Not to say that it was easy! I have donated, sold, and trashed MANY items. Sometimes I have to do a closet/bookshelf a second time to finally get it done.
The hardest things for me are the memory items (mom’s diary/address book/recipes, Dad’s annuals, PICTURES, artwork, crystal (some from family), and sets of china. I DID sell my sterlling silver for a GOOD amount of money and haven’t regretted it a bit. Thanks for your ideas!!
Andrea says
Yes, the memory items are almost always the most difficult to part with. Sounds like you are doing a good job though — selling some, taking pictures, etc. Those are all suggestions I would have given you 🙂
Kelly Skar-Pols says
I just read something yesterday about the cost of storing our “stuff”… or really “junk”.
It was somewhere around $92 per square foot.
Just thinking about that… whether it was yearly or monthly, I”m not even sure… has made me totally rethink all this”stuff” that I”ve been keeping “just in case”.
I just got rid of 10 garage bags FULL of clothes, decor, toys, household stuff that we never use.
And I actually even have one place in my pantry that is EMPTY……………
and that feels AMAZING!!!
Andrea says
hmmm… that’s interesting for sure!
And congrats on the big purge! I know just how that feels 🙂
Evie says
I like to pretend I’m shopping in one focus area in my house. Each item I don’t “want to buy” goes in the donation box…or in the trash if it’s too bad. I like to spend a few minutes on the things I do want to buy, maybe neatening the drawer or maybe finding a special new spot for display, Kind of fun to shop this way. I need to do it more often.
Andrea says
This is a great idea Evie! Thanks for sharing!
ShellyL says
I love this shopping idea!! Unfortunately, I shop more than I purge. I think I will try this fun idea and see how it works for me. Thanks!!
Christine @ The Mostly Simple Life says
I have always loved getting rid of things. It was fun for me when I was little to go through my bedroom and find things to get rid of. If I have a winter item that I didn’t use last winter, then I usually let it go. I like to think seasonally like that. I think it’s really easy to think that you use something all the time, but if you really think, maybe you used to use it all the time but it’s been 3 years since then. My husband has always saved everything, but my ways are subbing off on him 🙂
Davina Sanchez says
My husband finally let me get rid of his Scrabble Game (Deluxe Version)! I pointed out to him that in the 10 years we’ve been together, not one person has pulled it out to play a game even one time! It FINALLY went to a home where it would get used. Happy time!
Barb A. says
thank you Andrea. and for the fast response.
Barb A. says
I love your blog Andrea. It is my absolute favorite blog site in the world. Easy to read and to navigate and pure Midwestern common sense!
I am wondering what you do with beautiful family/friend Christmas photos which come every year-usually from the same set of people.
Currently they are posted on my triple front hall closet.
We live in an open concept ranch with little wall space.
Thanks if you can help me out.
Barb
Andrea says
Thanks Barb! I appreciate your loyal readership!
As for those holiday cards, we hang them up on the big post in our kitchen until the end of January, then we toss them. I know that might be harsh, but we know we’ll get another one next year and I don’t like keeping cards or photos 🙂
I do know of people who scan them in and make them part of their digital photo books so that’s another good idea.
Davina Sanchez says
I save the ones with photos and turn them into a 1 page collage and put them in my family scrapbook. I love looking back at how the families have changed.
Alison says
I am going to be purging the game cabinet today. My best tip for purging is looking at an item and asking yourself, “if I had to PAY to move this tomorrow, would I keep it?” Most people are ruthless when purging before a move, but less so when they aren’t moving…
Jen says
I’ve been in half-hearted purge-mode for a few weeks but this post helped motivate me to move into full-blown purge-mode this weekend.
I’m a packrat at heart, so this isn’t easy for me but I’m really trying to change my ways.
Victoria says
Love this post, read it twice! I had to become a purging fan, we felt we were running out of space in our “starter home” we’ve been in for 8 years! Due to the housing crash in our area we can’t move on, so we found after purging each year, we love our home more and are much happier here! Had 3 major purges earlier this month, felt so much better after. But I’m ready for more so re-reading the post for more inspiration! In addition to goodwill trips, We Took half of our kitchen and household items to the local homeless shelter that helps people attain and stock housing. As for husband memories, mine is learning to purge but would not get rid of old fraternity shirts/sweatshirts stored with out of season clothes. So, we bought 11×7 canvas cheap at hobby lobby, cut out the logo parts, covered the canvas by stapling them on. He loves them and has them up in his tool/work area in he basement now.
Buffy Quinn says
I purge, a lot! Nothing is safe in our house (unless its vintage glass). I don’t even save kid projects unless they are framed and on a wall:)
Stacy says
I’m right there with you, I hate to have things around that are not in use. I do the same thing I give to charity or friends and family. I hate to waste anything. I have reminders on my calendar to purge certain rooms and closets throughout the year. As you daughter grows so will your stuff, and you will appreciate the purge all that much more 🙂
Five4FiveMeals says
I am pretty heartless when it comes to purging. I don’t really have emotional attachments to things so I just throw them out. Why hoard things another person could benefit from? And I refused to feel guilted into keeping something because it had sentimental attachments for someone else.
Andrea says
Amen and Amen! I could not agree more 🙂
Melissa says
I actually have a box of items in my car right now that is going to the second hand book store with me after work tonight to see if they are interesting in purchasing any of it. Anything they don’t want will be going to Goodwill. The extra cash is nice, but really getting rid of more stuff we aren’t using is fantastic!
Marsha says
Do you have any suggestions for a husband that is a hoarder.
Andrea says
Well Marsha, if he truly is a hoarder, he’ll probably need professional (phycological) help. However, if he’s just messier than you’d like, here’s a post I wrote on that topic several months ago 🙂
Tracie says
Andrea –
I have found one thing to be especially helpful in my pursuit to purge. I keep a storage tote in my garage that is our “Donation” tote. As I am doing the laundry and come accross an item that I know is too small, a bit worn, or just not needed, I pull it aside and in the tote it goes. Weekly as my children (5) clean their rooms, they contribute items to the tote, when it is full (varies from weekt o week), it goes in the back of my van and off to a local donation center. It has made the purging process EASY and accessible! My kids all kow what that particular tote is for and aren’t afraid to use it. I think this is teaching them the value of sharing with others as well.
As my family is approaching the end of our current lease, I have a real “urge to purge” we have been fortunate to live in the same location for several years, which of course means several years of accumulation. One aspect of moving I love is the great “Clean Out”. As I am packing and organizing, I purge! No need to pack what I don’t want or need to unpack!
I have also consolidated each childs memory box to one tote…this will be passed to them with their school picutres from each year and a few pieces of art or special items from each school year. I have found it is another great use for a tote!
Jennifer says
I do purge pretty regularly (moving once a year for years has helped!), but the category of item I’m most likely to hang on to is the ‘it looks useful and crafty and could be transformed one day into a wonderful thing!’ category! I like to do crafts and projects, and also like to be thrifty, so I’ve been known to hoard things like scraps of fabric, paper, old containers, etc. The problem with those things is that I often don’t have a specific project in mind, so the thing hangs around indefinitely, without any guarantee of being useful.
The thing I now force myself to do to purge those collections is to ask myself: Do I have at least one specific use for the item and a realistic plan of putting it into use in the next 6 months to a year? If yes, I’m allowed to keep it; but if no, then it has to go! Planned crafts and projects are happily allowed; nebulous one-day-maybe projects aren’t.
This has been a hard thing to teach myself, but it’s gotten easier with time!
Andrea says
I can totally relate Jennifer. Even still, I have a tendency to hang onto old wood that we tear out of our house thinking “I could make something with that”. But I know I’m not a real crafty person, so instead, I give it to a friend of mine who is REALLY crafty. In exchange, she makes me cute crafty things — it’s a perfect situation 🙂
Kendra Burns says
I am a HUGE proponent of purging, as well. People call me crazy, but I am constantly listing things on our facebook yard sale page, making trips to donation centers, offering people free stuff. I am definitely not one to keep anything that I don’t use or love. My daughter, on the other hand, has to keep every single thing she draws, colors, makes, etc. Her room is my nemesis, but it’s her room so I let her do what she wants in there. I have a few set toys that our kids own and I like it that way (books are probably the biggest toy collection we own)! My garage is the worst, but everything is in at least bins and organized, but I would still like to have time to go through those bins and purge decorations we never put up, lights that are probably not working, etc., etc. It’s always a work in progress, right? Love your blog!
Andrea says
Thanks Kendra! Sounds like you’re a girl after my my own heart! I’m sure it’s tough for your to see your daughter keeping so much — but it’s honestly good that you let her have “her space”. If you purged all of her things, it would probably cause her to want to keep more and more, and she would be more likely to “hoard” things later on in life (I’ve seen this happen with many of my clients).
As for the garage — there are just not enough hours in the day! That’s why I always have my mater list available for those ‘some day’ projects I hope to get to.
LIbby says
My husband seems to have more sentimental clutter than me…college T-shirts…mugs/steins from his travels…artwork from his students etc. After we got married and combined households, we slowly went through his totes and totes of memories using a system similar to yours. Now he’s to the point where he quickly goes through one tote and keeps hardly anything…few things that are sentimental still, and that’s OK. We find a place for it. He even made a comment a few months ago about how he feels so good to get rid of so much “junk.”
Now I keep an empty diaper box in our mud-room and fill it slowly but sure with stuff to donate as I find it randomly around the house. Once the box is full, we just take it to Salvation Army and start on a whole new box. It works out to about once every month or two, which is perfect for our rate of going through diapers. Get rid of junk, recycle diaper box.
Andrea says
Sounds like you have a pretty good system going Libby! And congrats on getting your husband to purge. It often seems like there is one sentimental person in every relationship doesn’t it!
Lea Stormhammer says
Can I suggest making sure you ask your extended family if they want a family heirloom before throwing it out?
My MIL almost threw out a cabinet that belonged to her grandmother (it needed repair) because she didn’t like it and didn’t want to repair it. Fortunately my SIL saw her drag it down to the trash and took it home – it’s lovely and my SIL actually uses it. We found out afterward my MIL had actually thrown away irreplaceable family items that other family members wanted because she didn’t want them anymore and “didn’t have the energy” to ask around. It’s a small family so it would have taken 2, maybe 3 phone calls at most to ask. It caused some really badly hurt feelings – bad situation.
A brighter example: My cousin took up oil panting later in her 50s. My grandmother had been an oil painter and had given me her painting kit when her arthritis became too much for her to paint. She gave it to me because I was the “artistic” one in the family. I have never painted as a hobby – ever! I offered the kit to my cousin, who was thrilled to have it and share a hobby with Grandma. The kit and the portable easel have been very useful for my cousin and I feel blessed to be able to share with her.
I guess the one condition would be making arrangements for someone to come and pick things that can’t be shipped up or to share shipping expenses.
Hope that’s helpful!
Lea
Organize 365 says
I SO want to be purging and organizing my house this weekend, but we will be out of town. I think I am going to have to block off 5 hours and “hire myself” so I can get my own organizing done!
Have a great long weekend with Dave and Nora!
🙂
Lisa