Do your mornings feel rushed and chaotic?
Do your days feel like they fly away with little to nothing to show for them?
Do you constantly feel like you’re running behind or playing “catch-up”?
Do you flop into bed long after you hoped to be sleeping?
If so, your best bet might be to focus on your evening routine, because…
Organized and productive days almost always start with intentional evening routines.
Think about it for a minute… if you have a rough night and stay out way too late, there’s very little chance you’ll be ready and rearing to go at a reasonable hour the next morning.
And if you sleep in longer than you’d like, or you’re extra groggy and tired in the morning, you’ll likely end up running behind and feeling rushed for the entire day… which will cause you to stay up too late, trying to cram a few more things into your day, and the whole thing starts over again.
It’s a vicious cycle — one that can be very difficult to break unless you start at the source of the issue (a.k.a. you must create a more intentional evening routine).
How to Create an Intentional Evening Routine:
1. Start with your sleep:
The first order of business is to figure out how much sleep you need on a daily basis.
Most studies recommend adults get 7-8 hours of sleep — and while this may sound impossible, you can likely make it happen (with a little intentionality and planning ahead!)
Let’s go with 7 hours per night for now.
2. Determine your wake-up time (and your bedtime).
On a normal day, when do you need/want to wake up?
My general rule of thumb is that any parent of younger kids should wake up at least 30 minutes before their kids so they have a chance to get up, get ready, and feel a little more “with it” before kids enter the picture!
However, your wake-up time will depend largely on your personal schedule, how long it takes you to get ready (or get your kids ready), what you want/need to accomplish in the morning, and what time you need/want to leave the house.
Let’s say you plan to wake up at 6 am to be out the door by 7:30.
Once you know what time you will realistically wake up, then it’s time to calculate your ideal bedtime.
Since you want to get 7 hours of sleep each night and you need to wake up at 6:00, that means you need to get to bed by 10:30 so you have a bit of time to unwind, read, or listen to music, before hopefully falling asleep around 11:00.
3. Create a bedtime routine:
Now that you know you need to be IN bed by 10:30, it’s time to create a bedtime routine that leads up to 10:30.
I realize this might sound childish, but I speak from experience that I sleep SO much better if I follow a general bedtime routine.
Here’s my routine:
- Bring the dog out and put him in his kennel (around 9:30)
- Turn off all the lights and turn the heat down a couple degrees.
- Take a hot shower and put a bunch of lotion on (this helps my restless legs).
- Tie up any “loose ends” of projects, emails, computer work, laundry 😉.
- Make a to-do list for tomorrow.
- Read in bed until we turn the lights off (usually by 10:30).
Of course, there are nights when we stay out later or have other commitments that require adjustments to this routine… but on a “normal” night, this is my evening routine.
Your routine might include watching a favorite show, working on a craft project, having a cup of tea or hot chocolate, texting with friends or family, calling a college-age child, sitting in a hot tub, going for a walk, etc.
It could be an hour-long routine or just 10 minutes.
There’s no right or wrong evening routine — the point is that you try to do the same things night after night and get to bed at a consistent time so you can then wake up at the appropriate time without feeling super tired.
4. Plan your morning hours.
You know that famous quote: “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail”? Well, that applies to your mornings too!
BEFORE you go to bed, make a plan for your morning hours.
- What will you wear? (Your kids should pick out their clothing too.)
- What will you have for breakfast?
- Do you have your coffee/tea/water ready to go?
- Are your bags/backpacks/lunches packed?
- What will you do first when you wake up?
- What time (if any) do you or your family members need to be out the door?
Having a plan allows you to hit the ground running in the morning (even if you still feel a little groggy).
It also helps me sleep better, knowing I’ve done a mini brain dump before bed and hopefully won’t forget anything the next morning!
5. Protect your evening hours.
As you go throughout your day, continue thinking and planning ahead to your upcoming evening routine.
If you want to wake up at 6, you need to get to bed by 10:30, which means you need to start your evening routine by 9:30, which means you actually need to be home before 9:30.
I know this sounds SO ridiculously obvious, but this is where we often drop the ball.
We get going with our day, we’re having fun, we stay out later than we planned, and then our evening is shot, we get to bed too late, and the vicious cycle of chaotic mornings and unproductive days starts up all over again.
Protect your evening hours as much as possible, and be home in time to start your bedtime routine and get to bed on time.
Of course, there are seasons of life when evening routines are more challenging than others (like if you have a newborn who’s not sleeping through the night yet or if you’re struggling with chronic pain or illness).
However, for the vast majority of us, it all comes down to how much we prioritize our evening routines and our sleep.
Even as a self-proclaimed “early bird”, I can confidently say that it’s much easier to stay up later than I planned than to wake up earlier than I planned.
So do yourself a favor and be intentional with your evening hours.
Don’t fritter them away by scrolling social media or watching Netflix. Don’t waste them doing something you don’t really enjoy doing.
Create an intentional evening routine, and I’m confident your mornings (and your entire day) will run more smoothly and be more enjoyable.
Do you have an evening routine?
If so, share it in the comments to inspire other readers!
Kelly says
I just started doing this! I made notes about what I need/want to do in a typical day, and as I went through my day, made notes about what kind of “sequences” I typically prefer to do them in.
I am in my third trimester with my first child, so I am home a lot (not working) and my husband gets home late from work. I have a blank slate every day (no commitments right now) as all of my focus is preparing myself for birth and the transition into motherhood. I’m still making adjustments to my routine, but right now my evening routine looks like:
-Clean litter box
-Brush teeth & floss
-Set up my husband’s water bottle & coffee for the morning
-Clear the dishes
-Clutter sweep (what I call doing a quick “sweep” of our kitchen/living room area and putting away things where they belong, like jackets, blankets, remotes, etc)
-sleep (by midnight is the goal)
I don’t put times on my routine during this season. I find it is easier for me to stay consistent and motivated with a sequence than trying to always do things at certain times (since I have that flexibility right now).
I also have a routine for the morning, which has been more helpful than I anticipated. Knowing all my daily “tasks” have a “spot” in a sequence allows me to be relaxed in the moment, instead of constantly trying to figure out what I need to do next.
Andrea says
HI Kelly — congrats on your soon-to-be new baby. How exciting for you and your husband!
I love that you are resting up at home these days and just preparing yourself for this transition — so smart!!
Your evening routine sounds wonderfully simple and straightforward… good for you for having this in place now.
Thanks for sharing what is working for you – and blessings as you enter this new chapter in your life!
Kelly says
Thanks so much
Kelly says
I guess the emoji didn’t go through. So,
*Thanks so much 🙂
Christy says
Where did you buy the round dish with strainer in it that you keep your soap in. (On the round wooden board in your kitchen)
Restless legs— use Good night lotion from Earthley wellness
Joni says
I got one from Grove. http://www.grove.co
Andrea says
Yes Joni — I got mine from Grove too (years ago!) I love it!
It’s the Full Circle brand and you can actually get it on Amazon too!
Andrea says
Thanks for the restless legs tip, Christy!
As for the soap dish — it’s actually to hold a scrub brush, but I use it for my soap 🙂
It’s the Full Circle brand and you can get it on Amazon!
Kathy Maguire says
You are blessed with a very helpful husband. Many women don’t have that luxury.
Sandra says
Andrea that’s great now that you’re seeing it at 8 weeks and that you can have that bit
of routine! 🙂
Sandra
Sandra says
I’d say humor is also a good way of staying “on top” of things.
Shelley Dean says
I loved this post. I agree with all what you are saying, however sometimes I don’t have the energy to organized everything at nights. I have 1 daughter and I work full time. I wake up every day at 5 am. So honestly by the time i put my daughter to bed I am exhausted. Not sure what I can do to no matter what finish or get organized at nights. Any recommendations.
Andrea says
Hey Shelley, I totally understand what you’re saying… Dave and I are both up around 5:00 and Nora takes FOREVER to get to bed at night. I think for me, it just comes down to the fact that I know (from lots of experience) that if I don’t “do it now” my life will continue to get more disorganized and more stressful. Yes, I’m sometimes tired and don’t feel like doing it now, but I know that in the long run, taking 10 minutes to do something now will save me lots more time and stress later on.
Also, remember that even 5 or 10 minutes of focused work is better than nothing!
Jennifer says
Your posts about productiveness always impress and inspire me. I have to try to get all those little things done throughout the evening because our house is small and my son is a light sleeper. I play with him and when something is holding his attention, I try to get one little task completed. Many times when I have tried to do dishes or laundry quietly I haven’t been very successful and have woken him up. I don’t even try to do things after he’s in bed anymore except check emails and read. I wish my husband was so helpful. I love him to death, but he just isn’t very helpful. He’s not self-initiating and doesn’t pick up on routines either, so I always have to tell him what needs to be done for bedtime, to get ready for school, etc. He’s very sweet and loving and supportive, so I’ll keep him!! Just gotta work on communicating my needs. Do you have any advice for that, or is Dave just perceptive and/or as diligent as you are naturally???
Andrea says
Thanks Jennifer! It sounds like you’ve found a routine that works for you and your family. Nora was/is a really light sleeper too, so we didn’t do as much at night when she was sleeping on the main floor. Now she sleeps upstairs and we can get A LOT more done.
As for the hubby, here’s a post I wrote kind of about that. However, the main thing I would say is you DO need to ask. When we first got married, I would often get frustrated with Dave because he would pile dirty dishes in the sink after noticing that the dishwasher was clean (when hello, just clean it out!)
He flat-out told me that he wasn’t used to naturally looking for things to do and that if I wanted him to do something, I had to ask. So I asked, and he really never complained. Now, 8 years later, he’s better and seeing those things that need to be done (and he likes routine so that helps too).
I just read your comment to Dave and he busted out laughing because we BOTH joke about how he is one of the LEAST perceptive people ever… and he knows it. He’s getting better at noticing what needs to be done but mostly, I still have to ask.
Jennifer says
Ok–maybe it’s a guy thing, and not just my guy. Thanks for sharing, and for sharing with Dave. For some reason, thinking about him laughing makes me laugh and not so frustrated with my guy. I’ll just keep asking and telling and hope it sinks in some day.
Sue says
Yup,
that is the way most of them are.
Pascale says
Hello Jennifer,
For your son who is a light sleeper, have you tried putting on some white noise? I use the free fan on my iPhone and I adjust the volume accordingly.
I find it very convenient because I use it when we travel as well and I don’t have to bring an additional device.
I’ve also used the air purifier in our bedrooms because it has an integrated fan.
I know there are devices that use pink noise or brown noise which is considered better than white noise, but I wanted to use what I had on hand.
Organizing Life With Less says
Andrea, I always LOVE how personal, practical, and real you are in your posts! You write about topics that most people think about, but rarely talk about (or even dare talk about at that!) I really appreciate your candidness and even though I do not have kids, it is still refreshing to read these type of posts and read about how you live a REAL life. Thanks for sharing Andrea!
Jane says
One too many days waking up late has trained me to get as much done at night as possible. If I can do it the night before instead of the morning, I do it. And on those few odd days when the alarm doesn’t go off for whatever reason, I have less stress knowing most stuff is already to go (backpacks, lunches, clothes).
mary willis says
I do the same thing with my 2 year old as Dave does except I breastfeed my 4 month old and use my phone to make list, email until she falls asleep. My husband works for the railroad so most nights its just me and I do not always get laundry put away but try to at least have kitchen clean we have 5 kids.
Andrea says
Wow — you must be super woman! I can’t even imagine getting 5 kids to bed every night without Dave around. Sounds like you’re doing OK if you even get the laundry put away SOME of the nights 🙂
Kerrie says
That is so encouraging! As a fellow morning person, it’s good to see how your schedule can change to make life a bit easier. I’m having baby #2 any day now, and our toddler gets up really early, making it hard to get much done in the mornings. I haven’t been able to figure out how to get everything done, but your schedule has some great ideas. I love how practical your tips are for different stages of life!
Andrea says
Thanks Kerrie, and congrats on baby #2.
Nora gets up pretty early to (sometimes by 6:30) but fortunately, if I can fee Simon around 6:00, he’ll go back to bed until around 8:30ish. This means, I can get Nora dressed, fed, and working on something (playing, coloring, etc) while I quickly get dressed and ready — all before Simon gets up. Obviously, I’d rather sleep in later, but it’s also nice to have a little time with Nora in the morning.
Give yourself at least 4-6 after the new baby and I’m guessing you’ll start to see a few small “patterns” or “routines” start to fall into place. I’m starting to see it now at 8 weeks and it makes me feel like theres hope of more productive days ahead!
Elizabeth D. says
We have had our house on the market for almost 9 months, and I have an almost 3 yr old and a 1 yr old. We get about 2 showings a week on average, so my house has got to be clean all the time…oh did I mention both are boys? And my husband works 24 hours shifts at the fire station?! Organized nights are my KEY to the past years survival ( though I’m about to stop cleaning if no one is going to buy this house!); I have found something as small as setting out clothes for the next day is so much better, and having an unloaded dishwasher and clean kitchen makes the morning better. I used to have a laundry “day” but now I just do a load whenever a basket is full so I don’t get caught with piles on unfolded laundry or baskets of dirty laundry for strangers to look at! Waking up to a dirty or even cluttered house can make my day seem like a drudge. I would rather give up my “free time”, which is usually wasted, and have a happier, cleaner home.
Debbie W. says
I like the idea of getting a load ready to wash early in the morning! I don’t have a timer on my washing machine but after reading this I’m thinking it could be helpful for me to load the washer at night and just push the “start” button as soon as I get up. Then I can have a load washed a lot earlier than I do now. This is a good post to read – it’s making me think of what else can I do in the evening that I don’t currently do.
Andrea says
Thanks Debbie. And yes, even if you don’t have the delayed start feature on your washing machine, it’s SOOO nice to just be able to push the start button in the morning and have a load of laundry going right away. That’s a huge time-saver for me!
Patty@homemakersdaily.com says
That’s exactly the kind of routine I had when my kids were at home – except the working at home part. After they went to bed, we put the house back together and prepared for the next day and then sat down on the couch and watched a little tv. Pretty much the same general routine every evening.
But preparing for tomorrow the night before is definitely the way to go. By the time tomorrow gets here, things are already moving fast. I don’t have kids at home anymore but I still have a similar schedule. It works!
Andrea says
Sounds like a good routine to me — and Dave and I are usually watching something on Netflix or a show on TV while we work. Multi-tasking 🙂
Amy says
I so have to show my husband this post. You could almost be looking in our window at night!
We both work outside of the home and it is much easier to get everyone going in the morning when you walk downstairs and don’t see dishes, toys, blankets etc. There is also less temptation to get off the morning routine.
I also have my own “zone cleaning” I do every day from 4:30-5pm. That is right when we get home and the kids need a snack and downtime from the day. One half hour show and I challenge myself to get the mail sorted, dishes put away and one “area” cleaned up or organized. Alot can be done in 30 minutes when it’s just maintenance.
Andrea says
I love the zone cleaning — doing a little bit every day is a fabulous way to stay on top of things! And I love that you set those challenges for yourself to get so much accomplished during on TV show. I do that with commercials — try to get XXX done during each commercial break!
Demaroge says
I think I was reading here on your blog and this really has been helping me. ‘Do it now; the person I am in the morning will thank me.’ (That is a loose quote off the top of my head!)
It really has been helping me. I actually think…. I will do it now and thank myself in a few minutes! LOL! So silly the ‘tricks’ I have to do to trick my darn self! LOL
Rochelle says
I love this post, because I can so relate! As a mom of 5 (soon to be 6), night time is the only time that I am productive. People often ask me, why I stay up so late at night & what I do during the evening. I am not a “veg out” in front of the TV kind of person, so I don’t mind getting organized at night to make the next day run more smoothly.
Kristen @ Joyfullythriving says
I’m becoming more of a night person, too, for the main reason that I have both hands available to do things then! My baby is a good napper during the day – but prefers those naps to be in my arms! Until he learns to do otherwise, I’m getting good at doing things one handed (like type this comment) and use the night time hours to be productive. And yes, afternoon naps help!
Andrea says
I never used to be a napper (and honestly, I’m still not) but I can tell if I don’t get my 15-20 minute “rest”. I’ve become used to it and it really does help me energize for the rest of the day!
Enjoy all your one-handed tasks 🙂
Kim {Pinspired Home} says
I try to sit down on Sunday night or Monday Morning and make a plan for the week using a “week at a glance” notepad I picked up at the dollar store. On it are appointments, tasks that need to be accomplished, and our weekly meal plan.
I’m not nearly as organized and disciplined as you, but on the weeks that I take the time to write out a game plan, my weeks go much more smoothly. 🙂
Andrea says
Kim, we also do something similar to you — sitting down on Sunday afternoon and going over the plans for the week. Obviously, this isn’t too difficult for us since we don’t have older kids with busy schedules, but it’s still really helpful to look ahead. In my opinion, ANYTHING you do to plan ahead is worth it. Sounds like you have a good system 🙂
Organize 365 says
🙂 I started taking baths at 8 pm when my kids where little too. I LOVE my nighttime bath.
I love these peeks into your day. I can always glean something to make my routine run a little more smoothly too.
Looks like you have had a MUCH easier transition to being a mom of two!
🙂
Lisa
Andrea says
Thanks Lisa! And yes, it has been an easier transition — mainly because I actually had some idea of what to expect this time 🙂
Carrie says
It is so nice to hear from another night owl. I have tried to be a morning person, but it just doesn’t work. I also try to get everything done at night.
One thing that you do that I always find very helpful is to shower at night. It saves so much time in the morning, plus I can’t stand going to bed without being clean.
Andrea says
Haha — I’m actually a MAJOR morning person. I’m not sure if you read to the end of the post or not, but I had to train myself to be more of a night owl — and it took many months to do. I would much MUCH rather get up early and be productive then, but that just doesn’t work with our schedules right now because Nora usually wakes up by 6:30 and Simon is up several times in the night yet. Plus, if I wake up early and make any noise, Nora will be up ever earlier!
I will say that I ALWAYS take my shower at night — no matter what, because yes, it does save time in the morning. Plus, I sleep better when I’m clean 🙂