I receive many emails on a daily and weekly basis — many of them are for informational purposes, some are asking questions about my business or my blog, and some are simply kind words of appreciation and encouragement (thank you!)
However, there are also a few nasty ones that pop up in my inbox every once in a while — and they bug me so much.
Not that I think everyone needs to like me or approve of what I do (honestly, I’m really not the ‘people pleaser’ type of person).
I just can’t get over how mean someone needs to be to take time out of their day to sit down and type lengthy emails expressing why someone they’ve never even met in real life is “a horrible person”, has “a stupid blog”, is “not a good Christian”, is “failing their family by not feeding them all Real Food”, or is “turning their child into a spoiled brat” (yes, seriously… these are all real emails I’ve received!)
I delete the mean emails and move on with my day — but sometimes the words stick with me. I think of them as I type, as I make dinner, or as I contemplate how long I can outlast yet another temper tantrum.
Then I remind myself that the people behind those emails don’t really know me. They don’t have my life, my job, or my family. They can only judge me if I let them.
And I don’t let them!
.
Recently, I received a nasty email that went on about how boring my blog is and how ridiculous it is for me to post pictures and share updates of Nora on my blog.
Just for that last statement, Nora is giving them the evil eye…
A quote from this email stated:
“Most of your ideas are not rocket science… I’m sure you are bright enough and are not intentionally turning people off. Consider the fact that just because people are afraid to speak up and are concerned about hurting your feelings does not mean that they appreciate what your blog sometimes deteriorates into.”
As I glazed over the email and prepared to hit “DELETE” my eyes kept going back to the phrase “Most of your ideas are not rocket science.”
.
It’s not rocket science.
I’ve heard this phrase many times in my life — and I’m certain I’ve said it a handful of times too. I was curious to exactly where it originated… so I did a little online research. I found a ton of information, but I think this Phrase Finder explanation says it best…
“It’s not rocket science” simply means: It (the subject under discussion) isn’t difficult to understand.
Exactly!
That’s 100% the goal I’m striving for here at AndreaDekker.com.
My goal with every blog post is to make sure: It (organizing, budgeting, meal planning, scheduling, working from home, raising a family) isn’t difficult to understand.
As I’ve mentioned over and over and OVER again — Andrea Dekker is a brand, a business, and a blog that focuses on simplifying REAL life for real families with real budgets, real schedules, real homes, and real lives.
So of course the ideas and concepts presented on my blog are not rocket science. I never intended them to be rocket science. In fact, it would defeat both my business and personal goals if my ideas were rocket science!
So while that particular email attempted to make me feel inferior and defeated, it actually did just the opposite. It confirmed that what I’m doing here on AndreaDekker.com is working!
I’m successfully sharing recipes, organizing ideas, time management tips, frugal advice, and more in a way that “isn’t difficult to understand” — certainly no rocket science degrees required for this blog.
I realize I’m not the most talented writer, or parent, or business person, or chef, or house keeper.
I don’t have eloquent words like Ann.
I’m not overflowing with motherly wisdom like Sarah and Rachel.
I’m not a poet like Jodi.
I don’t have an amazing life story (or quick wit) like Glennon.
I’m not patient, humble, or overly-generous like Crystal.
But I AM real.
I write what I know, what I do, what works for me, and what I hope will be useful for you (spelling mistakes, grammar slip-ups, blurry photos, and all).
The content of my blog is NOT rocket science… it’s real life.
And I think that’s a whole lot better!
Don’t you?
{Please note, the purpose of this post is not to “get back at” the writer of that email. I never even responded to the email. I simply thought it made a really good point that my blog is NOT rocket science. There is no need to defend me in the comments. I know that the majority of readers DO appreciate the efforts I put into maintaining this blog — thank you for that!}
Nancy says
I wonder why someone that doesn’t like your blog would be spending time on it. Bet they have a lot of extra time because they don’t have many friends.
I have gone to several blogs and didn’t go back, because they just didn’t touch me. That doesn’t mean others wouldn’t like it.
Thanks for yours, I enjoy it. Probably because I’m not into rocket science.
Nancy
Debbie says
Thanks for keeping it real and simple. That’s why I read your blog and tell my friends about it.
Tracie says
I personally LOVE that your site “is what it is”. The fact that you are “REAL” and I feel transparent with your readers is one of the very reasons that I follow. As Paul says in scripture, “you can’t please all of the people all of the time”, but you are doing what God has called YOU to do through YOUR blog….that is the only accountability you are required to answer to.
Thank you for posting a REAL answer.
Vanessa says
I will never understand people who feel the need to tell bloggers or tweeters everything they think is wrong with them. Why not just stop reading, unfollow, etc.? I can only assume these are bitter, unhappy people, and then feel sorry for them.
Erin says
You’re a whole bottle of awesome-sauce. I love this blog and you’re doing a great job. Good for you for not letting rude, negative readers get you down. You sure can’t please everyone! I really can’t handle rocket science in my life right now; your content is bang on for inspiring and encouraging me every week. Thanks Andrea.
Nena says
I am glad you didnt allow that person to affect you.. what a loser .. people are so rude! I love your blog and Nora! 🙂
Kim c says
There will always be people who will try to drag others down. I enjoy your blog and always look forward to your posts. All the best wishes for you and your family. Have a great day and thank you for all you do!
Cherie says
Andrea,
I can not tell you how much I have learned from your blog. My life can be so busy sometimes the simple ideas will escape you! Your top 5 to do list idea has done wonders for me! I appreciate your blog and I NEED your time management experience in my life.
Keep them coming…..
You are who you are and I appreciate you!
Christina says
Rudeness is a way of life these days. I continue to be shocked by what some people feel the need so say, or type, or what have you, to offend others. Being rude is simply an ‘insecurity’ of the person expressing it. It is a lack of intelligence, compassion, and frankly it’s “their own issues” that they are commenting on. You see in others what you lack yourself.
I thought of writing a blog myself, and the negative comment are a big reason I don’t. (& the time commitment) I applaud you for handling things continually with grace and style Andrea!!! On behalf of all of us who LOVE your blog… good for you for turning a negative into a postive!
THANKS for all you do! You have helped me tremendously these last few years! Keep on your your brand of “rocket science!”
Kim says
If this isn’t an example of how society has come to an unprecidented level of rudeness……….I am just sick about these kinds of comments. Let’s make it our goal to give an encourging word to people. Thank you for your blog. I enjoy it, I learn from it. I admire you and Dave.
Sandra says
You know that’s why I like you, you are real, I feel like when I read your blog, it’s like talking to a really awesome mom from the neighbourhood, exchanging ideas, sharing updates about our kids…and aside from that, you have responded always with care and respect on FB, where I’ve often left comments on your posts there. Thanks Andrea 🙂
Julie says
Like you, I’m baffled by people who take the time to complain about something they have control over – if someone doesn’t like your blog, or finds it boring, there’s a very simple solution…don’t read your blog!
But for those of us who do enjoy the things you write and find helpful ideas, please keep on sharing.
Kathryn says
Keep up the great blogging Andrea! You do a fab job with all your organizing ideas and it’s kind of you to share the way you live with the world. Stay who you are. 🙂
Lori says
I love and appreciate your blog. Other blogs come and go on my reading list but I’ve read yours every day for months. Thank you for the time and effort you put into it. You have taught me so much about things that for some of us ARE rocket science until you explain them so clearly! Keep it up!
Ellie says
I love your blog! Please keep posting pics of Nora…they encourage me as I am also a mom. I know you don’t care what those mean ppl think, but just for the record I definitely do NOT think Nora is spoiled. She is well loved, and all children deserve to receive such love. Keep up the awesome blogging Andrea!!!
shelly says
I love your blog and everything you post. A lot of times its things that get me saying ” why didn’t I think of that” and so forth. Love the frugal ideas and tips, easy recipes, progress on your home and updates about Nora. Whoever sent you that should back away from the computer and seek meds. lol~
I have learned to make jam, organize better, make homemade things like shampoo and the list goes on and on.
Really looking forward to your post on how you did with spending freeze.
You have so many that enjoy and look forward to your posts each day. Thank you for sharing your creative spirit!
leslie says
Does not take rocket science to have bad manners and hurt others!! Appreciate you and your sweet family! Blessings!
donna wigley says
Love your blog and Nora is just beautiful.
Sarah says
Andrea, we are on very different “planets” and yet I love, love, love your blog. I am an observant Orthodox Jewish mother of four children ages 6 and under. I live in a 3 bedroom apartment in Brooklyn, NY. My life is hectic, to put it mildly. 😉 I am constantly reassessing and reorganizing my space. You are truly unique in your organizational skills and in your ability to motivate others. Keep up the amazing work.
Amie says
I am starting to try to incorporate “minimalism” into my life. My family is over scheduled, too busy, living with too much, etc. This week I decided to cut back on my blog subscriptions and reading…trying to cut back and free up my time…YOUR blog was the one blog I kept on my reading list. I LOVE your posts, insights, etc. you have a great mix of information, advice, thoughts, etc. Thank you!
Siobhan says
I pity negative people. Life is way too short. There are so many tragedies and people suffering…they should use their negativity to do something nice for someone instead. Your blog is very informational and your daughter is adorable. Keep doing what your doing.
Beth says
You and I disagree on many things in how we approach them and the decisions we ultimately make. We also have a lot of shared areas. That is one reason of many I come to your blog almost daily. I need perspective and ideas from someone who isn’t exactly like me. I find “food for thought” when I read something you’ve posted I don’t agree with and support or inspiration when I do agree.
Easier said than done, but don’t let the mean people or disrespectful comments bother you. The meanness and disrespect Is about their issues…not your’s.
Happy Thursday, btw and keep up the great blog!!
kathy w says
I don’t understand why someone to spend their time telling you bad things about your blog, when they have a choice to read it or not. I they don’t agree with the way you do things you are
not pulling their leg. I have learned a lot from your blog and use it as a reference point when I
am looking for a new appliance or trying to get a idea about a thought I have. You spend a tremendous amount of time and energy providing information on Real Live things. You open up your home to your readers and invite us in to see what you are up to and that takes a lot of
courage. Just know you have far more supporters that look forward to what you share. It only takes one nasty comment to make you question yourself, but just feel sorry for them and maybe one day they will get it. Love your Blog!
Liz says
For the record, I too love your blog…I feel like we could be best friends. 🙂 You are sooo easy to relate too and to put it simply, you are SO REAL! I find a lot of enjoyment in reading your blogs, they give me a lot of encouragement and I can relate to a lot of them.
Thanks for all you do…keep the blogs, recipes, advice, and helpful ideas coming! We can only benefit from what you have to say.
Tammy Skipper (@Tammy_Skipper) says
I completely agree that this is precisely WHY I follow your blog! There is so much information today and I tend to overthink everything as it is…someone who gets back to basics and just gets. things. done. is exactly what I need. thank you for being part of that in my life by sharing your words (and Nora!) with us!
Gina says
I have followed your blog for about 3 years.On days I am especially unmotivated to tackle my day I usually log on and read your current post. Following your life has been like having a conversation with a good friend. It is simple and sweet. I’ve never felt the tone of “follow me and you’ll be doing it right” from anything you have ever written. Instead I see a real life being lived out among friends. It is because of that that I have followed you as long as I have. Thank you for the casual conversation that has helped me, an organizational mess, to find a smiling face to “talk” with about the day to day things that make up a life.
Francine says
I’m sorry there are rude people who have nothing better to do with their time than hurt someone they may not even know. I love your blog and ideas and appreciate you sharing them.
Sharyl says
Gigantic hugs of thanks.
Some people are just creeps! You rock on! Luv all of your shares…and if they have issues…Leave! Right?
Jeepers creepers! Totally hear you there. Just not nice. Again thanks and giant hugs to you all.
Lynn says
First, let me say that I’m strictly a reader, not a person who comments. I enjoy your blog very much. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t waste my very limited time reading it. I am older than you, I have a 19 year old and a 10 year old, so one would think I would have this “mom/cooking/cleaning/organizing” thing all figured out. But, we can always learn new ways, methods, ideas or just expand our mind as to how other women make it work for them.
Thank you for sharing your ideas.
Heather says
I share your blog with everyone. I for one like that you don’t cram your faith down everyone’s throat and that you aren’t the apostle of piety like some others. I can come to your blog, get a gentle reminder to take time to plan or time for myself, get a quick recipe, see adorable pictures of your gorgeous daughter and be validated that I’m normal, living a normal existence in a world that sometimes moves too fast and furious to keep up. And on a side note – I too have a bad sleeper and I have good news. She’s 27 months old and we have turned a corner. She is sleeping through the night now more often than not. Now I have to relearn how to sleep through the night but there is light at the end of the tunnel!
Faith @ Artistic31Mama says
I love, love, love your blog. I love that is isn’t rocket science. It’s real, it’s simple and it’s fun. 🙂 You allow us a peak into your precious life and share your beautiful family with us. The ideas you have are practical and something everyone can use and implement in their homes. I’m glad you do not listen to the words of negative emails or try to please people who aren’t “satisfied” with your blog. You’re doing a good thing here…a very good thing. 🙂 <3!
Christy says
And by the way, Nora is adorable, and I love seeing pictures of her. If I had a blog, I would be “showing off” my little beauties too! Keep it up…..they grow soooo fast!
Alana @ Grace-Full Intentions says
The one thing I don’t understand about people who leave comments/send emails like this is: if they think your blog is so boring and they don’t like updates on your daughter then WHY READ IT? Seriously, why do people continue to read blogs that they don’t like and exert all that extra energy to write a nasty email? I just can’t understand it….
Christy says
I just want to say, Dont ever let the nasty emails get you down. I love your blog, your information, and your heart. I too am a Christian, and it is so hard to let go of those that judge you. The good thing is is that we only have one Judge and He is the only One that matters! Keep up the good work and keep typing away!!!!
God Bless you!
Christy
Jennifer says
I happen to enjoy your blog! I love hearing about Nora and what she is up to and in to! I come back to your blog time and time again because it is real and it is simple. Don’t change a thing! Continue on just as you are. It is just what I need 🙂
Katie P says
Andrea, I just want to say that for me your blog is a respite. With all of the different messages around us, the expectations (placed on us by ourselves or others), the pressure we may feel from Pinterest to be perfect, etc….all of these sort of things can make us feel overwhelmed and we may begin to think that doing life well is impossible. I know I’ve been there. I read your blog consistently because I feel like you do such a good job of helping simplify where it could seem overwhelming and encourage where some may feel failure. You ARE THE REAL DEAL and I thoroughly appreciate what you do. You encourage focusing on what is important in life. I often think I would like to meet you! Be encouraged that you ARE helping and inspiring people in a very rare and real way.
Katie
Georgette says
Andrea I LOVE your Blog!!! You have helped me and so many other people with so many things in our lives organizing, cooking etc… It truly is Amazing how people can be so rude, I guess they were never taught if they don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all!! They obviously have way too much time on their hands and have nothing better to do. The part about not being a good Christian I guess they didn’t read the Scripture in Matthew 7:1-3! It’s Apparent that you are doing an Wonderful Job with all the comments that are here so keep up the good work!!!:)
Kelly says
They’re jealous 🙂 Keep on doing what you do. You have definitely influenced my life. When we were building and lived in utter chaos, the one thing that made me smile every morning was my organized “getting ready” basket which I read about on your site at like one in the morning and frantically ran around the house searching for little containers and a basket because I had to have one instantly. It was not rocket science but it sure was a wonderful seed and I no longer have a getting ready basket since I have a huge master bath but I have a wonderfully organized getting ready drawer that was definitely influenced from my basket at our old house. If you’re not organized first thing in the morning, how can you be organized all day? Keep it up!!!
Jen says
Just as an FYI- your blog is the only one I read, and I do not have a husband or baby! Just this week I forwarded your dinner recipe to my best friend who made a delicious fish and brocolli dinner for me and her husband! Your blog is great 🙂
Jenny says
Andrea, I love your blog! You are a source of inspiration & motivation for me. Keep up the great job!!!