Do you keep your cell phone (or other electronics) in your bedroom at night? I’d love to know what works for you… and why!
As I continue to pursue a simpler life at home, technology is one topic I’ve researched and committed to monitoring for myself and my family.
Since our children are all still relatively young, we haven’t had issues with phones, tablets, or computers yet (because they don’t have access to any of them!) 😉
However, for the first time ever, Nora (3rd grade) has weekly computer homework. It’s just typing exercises, but it’s a “gateway” to more freedom on the computer.
Also, Nora knows how to work our smart TV to find the shows they want to watch on Netflix, YouTube, Disney Jr, PBS Kids, and Nick Jr.
To be perfectly honest, I really don’t think we have anything to worry about… yet. But I want to be prepared for future conversations, issues, or situations that will occur in the very near future (we’ll have a middle schooler in just a couple of years!)
I’ve read a handful of books on smarter, safer technology use in the home. I’ve also watched a couple of documentaries geared towards the effects of social media and being constantly connected to the internet via our smartphones.
Books I’ve Read:
- Digital Minimalism (Cal Newport)
- Raising a Screen Smart Kid (Julianna Miner)
- Screen Smart Parenting (Jodi Gold)
Documentaries I’ve Watched:
- Childhood 2.0 (very well-done and not totally one-sided)
- The Social Dilemma on Netflix (also well done, but slightly more “skewed” opinions)
Hot Topic = Cell Phones in the Bedrooms…
So often, a recommendation of these books and documentaries is to remove cell phones (and all electronics) from the bedroom — for both children AND adults.
As I mentioned above, our children have no access to any electronics, and Dave and I only have our phones in our bedroom.
After watching and reading, I’ve felt like we should consider leaving our phones on our desk or in the kitchen… after all, they make very valid “arguments”.
But I honestly don’t feel like this suggestion makes sense for Dave and me.
Maybe I’m missing something though?
Backstory: Why we keep our phones in our bedrooms.
#1 = No Landline: Dave and I have never had a landline, so we’ve always kept our cell phones in our bedroom (even before we had smartphones, and even before we had the internet in our home).
#2 = Our Phones are Our Alarms: We don’t have a traditional alarm clock as our phones work so well. We also use them as flashlights in the middle of the night (which has been SO handy when our kids wake up and can’t find something in their bed.)
#3= We Like to Read Before Bed: We usually read for 10-20 minutes before turning out the light. And if one of us is more tired than the other, we can still read even with the light off.
#4 = It Feels Safer for Me: Keeping our phones in our bedroom feels like a “safer” option than leaving them out in the kitchen or office. I like to know that if something happened, I could quickly grab my phone and make a necessary call.
And on the flip side, if someone NEEDED to get ahold of us in an emergency situation, I would be close enough to my phone that I’d hear the vibrating ring and be able to answer.
As I read through the list above, I can come up with reasonable workarounds for my “excuses”…
- Get a landline and keep that phone in our bedroom.
- Keep a flashlight next to our beds
- Read a book with the light on
- Use the landline to call — and hope that people remember to call our landline instead of our cell phones if there is an emergency.
However, I keep going back to my original thought that it just doesn’t feel necessary to go through the extra effort to NOT keep our phones in our bedrooms.
The phones don’t feel like an obsession or distraction for us, they don’t keep us up all night with text messages and emails, and they don’t seem to detract from our quality of sleep in any way.
So… I’m curious…
Do you keep your phones (or any other electronics in your bedroom)?
If not, why not?
If so, what devices do you keep in your room? And why?
Share your thoughts in the comments — I’d love to start a discussion!
Melissa F says
I have had my iphone in our room for a long time. I used to listen to an audiobook before going to sleep. At the moment, I’m “testing the waters” and leaving it in the kitchen charging station. (I still had an alarm clock on my nightstand and flashlight next to our bed from the “old” days before mobile phones!) I feel like leaving the phone behind is a good role model for our kids 22, 18, and 14. I also find I actually sleep better without the phone on the nightstand right next to my head. I’m not sure if there’s anything scientific to that, but I trust my observation and I think I will continue to leave the phone downstairs for a while longer. This is such an interesting conversation. I read a lot of the comments, but not all of them — have others tried not having a phone for a time just to see what it’s like?
Jean says
Yes but I have turned off all notifications
Jill Peterson says
I, personally, keep my phone in my bedroom. It is on “do not disturb” from 10pm- 6 am. BUT, it IS set up for any of my emergency contacts to ring thru if they call. (I have aging parents that HAVE called in the middle of the night.) After raising 4 kids, I would do things much differently when it comes to phones. It would be a requirement to keep phones out of their bedrooms at night until they’re 18. We’ve had too many times that the kids have been “helping a friend thru a tough time” on the phone until 2 am on a school night, as well as other issues.
AEW says
Personally I keep my phone in the kitchen, I have an Apple Watch that can serve as an alarm and also make an emergency call in a pinch plus the kitchen isn’t that far if I need it quickly. I just find it’s better for me since then I get up in the morning and am not tempted to check email, news, etc before getting out of bed. That being said my husband keeps his next to him in our room, it’s what works for him. Kids (MS and HS aged) aren’t allowed to keep them in their room unless they’re sick. What it comes down to is that’s what works for US, but everyone should do what works for them!
Linda says
If keeping your phones in your bedroom works for you, that’s great – and keep doing that.
I prefer not to keep mine near me at night. I’ve never needed my phone in the middle of the night. There’s a lot less temptation for me to check something quickly when I should be sleeping!
For my teenage kids though, their phones are never allowed in their bedroom. We’d rather that they didn’t hide away on their own in ‘screen-land’. They charge their phones at night in their lockers.
Connie says
This is a late comment, but making it anyway LOL. I think a lot of it depends on how much willpower you have. I do leave my phone on my nightstand. My kids are grown and live out of state so I want to be able to answer the phone if they call me 24/7. I do have my phone set where all notifications will turn off from 11:00 to 7:00 except for phone calls from my Favorites (which are all family members). My husband does the same but his phone is the first thing he picks up in the morning and often is late to breakfast because he’s so distracted scrolling through social media. So there you have both sides of the coin. You have to know yourself to know what works best for you.
Andrea says
not really “late” — I just posed the question on Friday 🙂
Thanks for sharing what works for you — sounds like a good system. And yes, willpower is a must for keeping the phone in the room!
Janet says
Yes! A phone belongs in the bedroom in case of an emergency. You may need to call for help and you don’t want to be running around the house in the middle of the night wondering where you put the phone.
Brittany says
Yes, both my husband and I keep our phones in our bedroom at night for the exact reasons that you listed above. The recommendation for adults to keep them out of bedrooms feels like a tool to help prevent you from losing sleep or to make it easier to not check your phones constantly. If those aren’t currently an issue in your house then it feels like you are trying to fix something that isn’t actually broken. The safety dilemmas that you listed are why I keep my phone in my room at night because I know that to not have my phone would cause me anxiety.
Candace Herrod says
I totally keep my cell phone on my bedside table! That’s where my charger is. I use my cell phone for an alarm clock.. I have different alarms set for different days and different schedules… I’ve yet to find an alarm clock that can do as much.
Also, because I am very visually impaired, during the day time I wear contacts and I take them out at bedtime. When I wake up in the middle of the night, I need to be able to see what time it is and I can’t see further than a foot or so from my face. I also like to read in bed when my husband has already gone to sleep so I use an app for that. Flashlight? ALL the time. I also like to turn on coffee from upstairs so it’s ready when I get down so I use the Alexa app and a smart plug for that. I am adamantly against kids having technology in their bedrooms though because mine are not old enough to be able to self regulate their screen usage. I’ve never been able to commit
Liane says
I have all the same reasons you’ve listed. I got a cell phone in 2002. We had a landline phone that sucked $40 out of the budget monthly and it was never used because it was stuck on the wall in the kitchen. Finally decided to switch it to VOIP in the hope that the 99 scams a day calls could be screened and then eventually just jettisoned it along with directv. In the 18 yrs I’ve had a cell phone I’ve never once reached over to pick it up for any reason at all. I also need to use moisturizer drops in my eyes when I awaken and to do that in the dark in the middle of the night is a big hassle. I don’t have any games or reading apps on it. Just the stuff that came with it plus the various smart home controls.
I tell myself if the alarm goes off at night I can look at my camera app. In the 35 yrs I’ve lived here the alarm has only gone off because I forgot to turn it off. We’ve had an alarm system since then because my husband used to sell them. We’ve changed to more modern ones over the years of course.
My hubby and I over the years have had several issues that affect our sleep, he gets up frequently and wakes early. I like to watch the news on tv and go to bed at 11. ( We get one local channel LOL). So we decided that we needed to sleep in separate rooms which helps a bit. He flushes. A lot! But because I’m alone I feel safer with a life line next to the bed.
I’m sick of the social engineering that’s taking place and if I want a phone by the bed I’m going to have one! Kids are another story so unless the phone is set up so it’s only for talking and an alarm it needs to be put away. Out of reach. I do recall flashlights and comic books under the covers. We got caught of course. I do keep a flashlight by the bed also because we have frequent power outages and I like my toes unbroken and pain free. Phones can double as flashlights in hotels also. And they’d be by the bedside.
On my newer iPhone I use night shift and do not disturb and that is a schedule. Starts at 9 and ends at 8. Peaceful mornings!
Kim says
Yes, my husband and I keep our cell phones by our beds at night for all the reasons listed – no landline, safety if we needed to make an emergency call, availability if someone needed to call us in an emergency, severe weather alerts, flashlight, reading, alarm. It is not a problem or temptation for me to use it late at night or in the middle of the night. I like sleep too much! We used to have a no screens in the bedroom rule for our two kids (9 and 15) but we have relaxed that a little due to COVID and us all being home all/a lot of the time. Sometimes it makes more sense to have a kid do a zoom call or work on homework online in a bedroom than everyone try to work in the same space. We do use screen time restrictions available on apple devices to shut their screens down at night so they are not tempted to stay on them. My 9 year old also charges her school ipad downstairs. We let the teen charge her device in her room and use as her alarm, with those screen time restrictions in place.
Roxie says
I keep my cellphone in my bedroom. Still have a landline, but it’s bundled with the cable. If cable goes out I still have my cellphone. Turn it on do not disturb for texts and/or emails – but will allow phone calls to come through.
And how did Nora get to be in the 3rd grade already? Gee…time DOES fly!
Natalia says
I tried both and I like both. I did not notice any improvement in sleep quality when I had/have the phone outside. When I charge my phone in the office, I can still hear the alarm in the morning and in makes me get up right away ’cause it’s loud! When I have it in my room I like the convenience of jotting down thoughts and plans for the next day – if I need to – without getting out of bed or waking up my husband. I even checked the weather, recently, thinking about some outdoor work we needed to do. I can’t say I’m totally against having it my room.
I watched both documentaries you recommended. Wow! and… wow! Truly a wake up call.
Andrea says
Glad you watched both documentaries — they are really eye-opening! My thought process about social media and electronics is so different now!
Sarah says
It’s so funny to read this today because as my husband and I were chatting in bed this morning, I mentioned how thankful I am that neither of us take our phones into our room. We share a traditional alarm clock. We have our phones in a nearby room. They are on “do not disturb.” The people who would need to contact us in the middle of the night know that if they call two times in a row it will ring through.
This works for us and we absolutely love it. I’m working on being more disciplined with my phone, but I know that I would likely get drawn to the endless scrolling first thing in the morning. I would just rather not start my day having to make that choice!
Michelle says
Unless you are able to see electronics affecting you negatively, it should be fine to keep them where you need them. But, often they do and it can be difficult to change behavior. You seem like someone who can adapt however needed to fit your priorities.
As far as children and technology I have some resources for you. A book “Good pictures bad pictures” by Kristen A Jenson is written for children about the dangers of what they may see online and what to do if/when it happens. We kept that on the shelf and told our daughter she could come to us with questions once she was old enough to be in other people’s homes and her friends started carrying phones.
True Girl Ministries has lots of information about tweens and screens as well.
At our home it starts with communication, followed by rules around who can and where what can be used, followed by more communication and lots of grace.
Michelle says
Screens also do affect children’s ability to sleep, regulate emotions and behavior. When pediatricians recommend no more than an hour, this is why. We really had to pay attention to this when our daughter was a tween. We know better now with our son, so he only has screen time on the weekend and at specific times. It’s a great tool for managing behavior as well to earn that time or have it taken away.
sun says
This is a topic that is very important to me. First I will say we love electronics, and we are also very intentional with them because we do find them distracting. I don’t use facebook or any other social media, but I still love blogs. We don’t use any electronics in the bedroom other than a Kindle that doesn’t light up. We have a “land line”. Since you don’t, I agree you really need your phones with you. It seems like you and Dave are able to handle the temptation, and you are not going on the internet on your phones in your bedroom. So I think you are fine. Most people will be tempted to look something up or see an alert that they can’t ignore. If you want to try out really not touching your phones, I would take it one step further and place your phones in a drawer or at least turn your phones face down and not use them at all in your bedroom (except in case of emergency). You can get a tiny alarm clock or use your phone as an alarm if you can keep from touching in until it rings. 😉 You are very wise to consider how your children will handle this, and I like the idea of setting an example. You and Dave didn’t grow up with access to all the things children are tempted with today. It is a lot. Hopefully they’ll have as much self-control as you!
Amanda says
I keep my cell phone (alarm, no landline) in the bedroom but have a charging station on my dresser two steps away from the bed. This prevents aimless scrolling in bed and snoozing the alarm, seems to balance the anti-bedroom and convenience concerns for me. We have an almost 13-year old, and he is NOT allowed any internet connected screens in his room. His computer is downstairs, and he can use our porch or dining room if he wants privacy for a phone call or just separation from what we are watching/doing.
JoDi says
My cell phone is kept in our bedroom, but my husband’s is not. I keep mine on the nightstand for all the reasons you listed. It is on DND from 10 pm to 8 am so only emergency alerts and calls and texts from people marked as favorites in my Contacts get through. Nobody in my favorites texts late at night unless it is an emergency. My husband decided to start keeping his phone downstairs at night a year or so ago. He’s not techy so doesn’t want to be bothered setting up DND hours or favorites. His notifications are very loud and set to repeat because he works in construction and might miss hearing them otherwise when using tools, and he has a work associate who will text late at night or very early in the morning. Keeping his phone out of the bedroom is the simple solution.
I’ve read a lot about “screens” because I work in IT so screen time is always a concern of mine. I don’t think “one size fits all” recommendations are useful nor do they always stand the test of time. As an example, concern about blue light has been hot for several years, but I was recently reading that more current research suggests that it has a minimal effect, if any, on a person’s ability to fall asleep. So my approach to all these things is to take recommendations in books and articles as opportunities to reflect on what I’m currently doing and see if the suggested changes might be an improvement then try it out as a personal experiment and evaluate the impact on ME and my life. A lot of things are far less impactful in practice than they are in theory, but some things surprise you in how much of a difference they make so I’m always up for a bit of an experiment!
Katie says
We do not keep our cell phones in our bedroom. But we do have a land line and “old fashioned” alarm clocks. I try to stay off my phone in the evenings as much as possible. I think if you just have it there for emergency calls and an alarm, I think its fine. You know whether or not you’d be tempted to look at for long periods of time before bed! You are seem pretty disciplined. 🙂 My 5th grade daughters now have laptops at school. Each student is issued a laptop and all the learning is on it. There is very little paper anymore. (I don’t like this at all but we have no other options for schools in our area). We have made a rule of no screens in their bedrooms. I doubt there is anything bad on a school laptop but we don’t want to start the habit now.
Lauri Everlove says
We keep our cell phones in our bedroom and will continue to do so. We do not have an alarm so we do use that feature and also we find the flashlight to be useful too. I can’t tell you glad I was that my phone was close so I could call the police one early morning because someone was trying to come in our kitchen window.
Kim says
I keep mine right by my bed for the exact reasons you listed. Would never think to leave it anywhere else. My children are grown and have children of their own but what if they needed to reach us? It’s not something I think about I just plan on never being without a bedside phone. K
Andrea says
thanks for sharing Kim — good to know others have the same “routine” as we do!
Margaret says
I have my phone plugged into the charger on my nightstand, with the notifications turned off. It is in no way a problem. I use it as an alarm clock, and a flashlight, as you do, and simply do not pick it up (beyond turning off the alarm, duh) until I’m showered, dressed, and have my breakfast prepared.
In my pre-cell-phone days I kept the cordless handset for my landline beside the bed. I live alone, and in a worse-case scenario I want to be able to call 911 without having to get up. I’ve never had to do that, but that doesn’t mean I never will.
The only notification that still comes through is a severe weather warning, which means I no longer need a weather radio blasting me awake to tell me that all small craft on Lake Michigan should seek safe harbor immediately–pretty annoying when you’re halfway across Indiana. The city tornado sirens don’t wake me if the windows are closed, so I would keep the phone close for that reason alone.
I have my only TV hooked up to a DVD player in the bedroom, because nothing knocks me out faster than sitcoms from my childhood. As a lifelong insomniac, I’ll take sleep any way I can get it.
In short, only a problem if you let it be a problem.
Andrea says
Thanks Margaret — yes, so many things in life are “only problems if you let them be problems”. this was good to read again!
Danielle says
We leave our phones charging downstairs at night. We have alarm clocks, plus smartwatches. We go to bed at the same time and have night lights in various places for when the kids wake up at night. We feel safe but I guess we could always turn our watches off goodnight mode and make a phone call if needed. But we have only had the watches 1 year and have never had our phones in our bedroom….we just don’t see a need.
Pascale Forest says
Hi Andrea,
My husband and I both have our cell phones on our nightstands for a very specific reason, but we do the following two things.
First: We put our cell phones on airplane mode.
Second: We have a disc on each of our electronic devices and even on our cordless phones that protects us from the harmful effects of radiation. It is called xZubi.
We need to keep our cell phones nearby to track the quality of our sleep with the Sleep Cycle App. For us, this App that was recommended to us is truly worth it and having our phones on airplane mode doesn’t cause us any issue because we do the two things I mentioned previously.
Andrea says
interesting — what is this “disc” you have on your phones? Does it actually cover them up? or is it something you plug them into? What’s the brand?
Thanks!
Pascale Forest says
Andrea,
To answer your questions, here is what I copied and pasted from their website, xZubi is
“A small hologram sticker made of micro-thin layers of paramagnetic materials that absorbs and neutralizes man-made electromagnetic radiation.
All you do is stick the xZubi anywhere on the back of your cell phone or any electrical device that you come into contact with daily.”
If you want more info, here’s the website and the information explaining how it works.
https://greensmoothiegirl.com/emf/xzubi/
Andrea says
Thanks for sharing — I’ll need to look into this more!
Pascale says
My pleasure, Andrea.
Sarah says
We keep our cell phones on our night stands. I use mine as an alarm clock most nights. If I don’t need an alarm I power it off. I always keep it on vibrate or silence. We also have a home phone so someone can reach us on that as well. If used responsibly I think it’s fine and gives people a sense of safety by having their phone accessible for emergencies.
Debbie says
We’ve never had a landline as well. Our smart phones also serve as our alarm, flashlight, and timer.
Mary says
We don’t have a landline either. I have my cell phone on my nightstand every night, while my husband’s is downstairs. It’s just my husband and I, but I feel safer knowing I can call 911 if needed. I also have an elderly aunt for whom I’m responsible, so it’s important that her nursing home can contact me when needed (which was just a few weeks ago). I’m recently retired, so I don’t need the alarm function at this point 😉 but used it in the past. This works well for us.
Abbie says
I have trouble sleeping. My mind races before I go to sleep and races every time I wake up throughout the night. I have found that watching a video on my iPad that is interesting enough to keep my mind from racing, but not so interesting I want to stay awake to see how the video ends is a good way for me to calm my mind and fall asleep.
I went to a sleep therapist and mentioned this to him as I had read the blue light from the screen is not good for sleep, but I was getting better sleep watching videos. He said to go with what helped me personally- each person is different, and each person has a different reaction to the blue light.
Andrea says
that’s interesting — I’ve heard a lot about blue light too. Thanks for sharing!
Hilda says
I do that too and always thought the blue light was bad for me, but it helps me fall asleep so much better. I watch Friends episodes, which I’ve seen a million times. It focuses my mind so I don’t think about other things and allows me to fall asleep quickly. I feel I get a much better sleep, despite the blue light. Glad to hear a sleep therapist agrees 🙂
Andrea says
Isn’t it interesting how we’re all “wired” differently (pun intended!)
Pascale Forest says
Abbie,
I go in my settings and choose the warmer color and the night mode even during the day. I find that this helps counteract the blue light emitted by my iPhone and iPad. I hope this helps you.
I know that there are quite a few blue light screen protectors that can be purchased and used for that purpose as well, but I wanted to try it this way first because I don’t have to purchase anything.
Dawn Kaestner says
We have a landline because it gives me peace of mind (my spouse and kids have memorized the number but couldn’t tell you everyone’s cell numbers by heart). If someone loses their cell phone or can’t use it in an emergency they ALWAYS know our home phone number. I also like knowing there are three landline phones (kitchen, my bedroom and upstairs) in case of a medical emergency. My teens usually have their phones on them but my husband and I have them charging or put away at home so knowing a landline is close by in an emergency (and easier to trace the location) is totally worth the $10 per month.
Andrea says
Thanks Dawn — what landline do you have for $10 a month??
Dawn Kaestner says
We had Comcast for internet and the landline was an addition $13 however, we just switched to Ziply Fiber for internet and their landline is $10 additional. If it were more expensive I could probably talk myself out of it eventually but $10 is worth the back-up for us.
Andrea says
Ok thanks — I’ll look into this!
Bonnie says
For years both my husband and I had jobs that required us to be”on call”….in other words “be available”.
When our married kids were expecting a baby ..you can bet your boots that I had my phone at the bedside to get the” mom we had our baby”call . As our parents aged we are once again having to be available to help with an issue or meet an ambulance at the hospital. We don’t have a problem with having our phones at our bedside..in fact they give us some measure of reassurance.
Our kids were married by time they bought thier own cell phones but I really feel for any parent trying to monitor thier teens!! There is so much junk and just plain bad stuff out there that I do worry about what they are seeing on thier own and others phones. Too many kids have too much unsupervised time in thier bedrooms watching junk
Karlyn says
I think all the “reasons” I’ve read for NOT keeping a cell phone in the bedroom are flimsy, and I could give a counterargument to all of them. The key is to use it wisely at night, just like we should be doing all day long. I charge mine on my nightstand every night, have it silenced during sleeping hours, and use it to wake up by in the morning to a pleasant soft musical sound. I can’t imagine waking up to the old standard manual alarm clocks of my childhood! 🙁
JoDi says
Ditto everything in your comment! I started using my cell phone as an alarm because I hated the jarring noise of my alarm clock. I would never go back!
My cell phone is a tool that has allowed me to simplify by eliminating several other tools. The cell phone also provides benefits those other tools did not like emergency notifications and the ability to fine tune which alerts get through and when. As another commenter said above, it’s only a problem if you let it become a problem.