Inside: Never underestimate the power a happy, peaceful home can have on your family, your community, and even the world! It’s a worthy pursuit, for sure!
I recently found myself in a conversation about “world peace”, and my first thought was Sandra Bullock’s pageant speech from the 2000 comedy, Miss Congeniality.
On a slightly more serious note, many of the women in my circle (lots of stay-at-home moms and grandmas) feel somewhat out of the loop when it comes to making a difference in the world around us.
I know my life often feels about the size of a fishbowl — living, working, and hanging out at home with my family for the vast majority of my days while others are out on the front lines fighting for freedom, justice, and peace.
What can we really do at home to counteract riots, mass shootings, incessant social media banter, sex trafficking, injustice, and political unrest — and instead promote more peace?
Like me, you may never be the type to stand in a crowded picket line, speak on stage about injustice, or spread the gospel to a third-world country, but I’m confident we can still do our part to create a more peaceful world… starting within our own homes.
“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”
Anne Frank
If you find yourself at home, thinking you can’t make a real difference or that your actions don’t matter, I hope you’ll reconsider!
More than ever, I’m convinced our homes are the launching point for big important world changes.
Don’t underestimate the power a happy, peaceful home can have on your family, your community, and even the world.
It’s a worthy pursuit, for sure!
1. Respect authority.
I’m not a political person, so this doesn’t just apply to government politics — rather anyone in authority over us.
Dave and I do not personally agree with every little decision made in our church, schools, and community — but that doesn’t mean we get defensive, cause an uproar, pull our kids out of school, or switch churches.
We also don’t always agree with every rule put in place by our local or national government and law enforcement — but we can still be respectful of these authority figures who are (hopefully) doing what they feel is best to keep us safe.
I can only assume that most of us reading here today do not lead our churches, our schools, our community, or our country… so instead of criticizing and complaining about decisions we often have very little control over, let’s choose to respect authority and model that respect for our children.
We don’t need to agree with authority, we don’t need to vote for them or even like them… just respect them (and pray for them to do God’s will).
Can you fathom the worldwide impact if everyone simply respected authority?
2. Realize “different” is not “bad” or “wrong”.
I dare to bet you have a few close friends and family members who feel differently than you do regarding religion, politics, finances, schooling, etc.
It’s easy to feel defensive when others blatantly disagree with us… oh, how well I know this!
But most of the time, neither side is necessarily right or wrong… we just have different opinions.
It doesn’t have to be personal if we don’t let it.
Just think how boring life would be if everyone agreed on everything all the time.
3. Monitor media.
Limiting my exposure to media is something I’ve consciously made an effort to do since 2012 when I realized the negative effect it had on my mental well-being.
I started by simply not watching as much TV, and it has since morphed into much more (all of which have benefited my life, my home, and my family).
Need some simple ideas to get started?
- Unsubscribe from magazines and newspapers.
- Stop listening to political or controversial radio stations.
- Monitor your new sources — we love The Pour Over and World Watch as they offer a Christian and “eternal” perspective on current events.
- Stop watching live TV. I always forget how quickly commercials affect me.
- Use social media sparingly (I only use Facebook Marketplace — nothing else, even for business.)
- Turn all cell phone notifications off (I only get notifications for phone calls and text messages from people I know).
- Delete social media and news apps from your phone (this has been SO freeing for me).
- Wear a watch. (I bought a watch so I’m not tempted to “check my phone” for the time and then get sucked down a rabbit trail of checking emails and updates.)
- Read a few good novels instead of the ever-popular self-help books (I’m a huge fan of Lynn Austin’s books)
- Read and memorize scripture.
These small changes contribute to a slower, more intentional, more content, and more peaceful life.
NOTE: If you’re struggling with fear, anxiety, depression, or just feeling inadequate, I encourage you to stop consuming the news and checking/updating your social media. Try to stay away for a full day, then a full week, then a month. This has truly been life-changing for me!
4. Speak truthfully.
It’s so easy to casually repeat something we hear… or spin information to sound more negative and make our current situation feel worse.
- Did you see what ____________ school/church/organization is doing?
- Did you hear what ___________ news program said?
- Can you believe what _______ company/brand/blogger said (or didn’t say) about ________?
Even if you don’t have young children at home who might be listening, it’s beneficial to pause before repeating these things out loud (and especially before sharing them online).
As the old saying goes “THINK before you speak”… is what you are about to say True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, Kind? If not, don’t say it!
5. Think positively.
Science confirms that perpetual negative self-talk has very detrimental effects on our mental well-being — while positive thinking can drastically improve our quality of life.
Make it a habit to stop yourself whenever you have negative thoughts (specifically about yourself, your current life situation, or the state of our country).
It’s not easy, but it gets easier over time.
Just think how much happier and more peaceful our world would be if everyone practiced some good, old-fashioned positive thinking!
6. Do something nice for someone else.
It’s easy to worry or feel anxious about all sorts of “what-if” situations when we constantly focus on OURSELVES.
If you catch yourself worrying, feeling anxious, or obsessively stockpiling toilet paper, consider distracting your mind and body by doing something nice for someone else.
- Call or text a friend to say “hi”.
- Help a neighbor with yard work.
- Make cards with your children and mail them to sick and elderly people in your community.
- Bring flowers to a neighbor.
- Go for a walk with your children/grandchildren, neighbor, or friend.
- Make a meal for someone.
You might be surprised how therapeutic it can be to help someone else in need.
Life is a lot more enjoyable (and peaceful) when we look out for each other instead of just ourselves.
7. Focus on what you CAN control.
Instead of focusing on all the things we can’t control, let’s focus on what we CAN control instead — namely, what happens inside the walls of our homes.
I believe our homes should restore us from the day and ready us for tomorrow, which is why I’m passionate about creating a more peaceful home environment for myself and my family.
I can’t control the world (much to my dismay!) but I can control much of what happens in my home.
And the ripple effect of a happy, peaceful home is far-reaching.
Ideas to create a more peaceful home:
- Live simply and within your means to reduce unnecessary stress.
- Do less — literally! Use the extra downtime to just hang out and enjoy being together.
- Keep your home clean and organized enough so your time spent at home is more relaxing and peaceful.
- Use what you have and do what you can to promote small positive changes.
- Model a life of contentment for your children and those around you.
It’s amazing what can spawn from small changes implemented first at home.
“What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.”
Mother Teresa
You don’t need millions of followers, the ability to speak eloquently, or a pageant stage to bring about world peace (or any widespread positive change).
Mandy says
I love a good mystery. I usually read psychological thrillers and listen to true crime podcasts. This past fall I’ve noticed the impact these “pastimes” are having on my overall mental health. Listening/reading about crime and bad stuff happening just isn’t relaxing. Shocker!
I’m trying a 30 day challenge where I only consume positive media and books. I’m currently listening to a Lynn Austin book and loving it. This post is just what I needed to read! Thanks, Andrea!
Andrea says
wow — this is awesome, Mandy (thanks for sharing)!
I love that you’ve taken the initiative to make one change that could have a hugely positive affect on your entire life. Way to go!
TRACI R says
Such a good read! I have a note on my computer screen at work that simply reads – Does it pass the Phil. 4:8 test? It is my reminder to ask myself – is it true? is it noble? is it praiseworthy? … etc. It helps me to guard my tongue =)
Andrea says
I love this idea, Traci! I actually have a really cute t-shirt with various wild flowers and under each flower is one of the characteristics from Phil 4:8. I always get compliments on it when I wear it too!
Nancy says
This is why I read your blog, so much hopeful. The most wonderful book I read recently is “Holy Moments” by Matthew Kelly. The basic premise is to treat every man, woman or child you meet as if they might be the Messiah. Sounds exhausting but Mr Kelly has lots of stories and examples. This has made me madly in love with everyone! We can change the world.
Andrea says
this does sound like a good book — adding it to my list now!
Sarah says
Thank you so much for this! It is tremendously encouraging to have practical actions to take towards cultivating peace in our hearts, homes, and flowing out from there. Peace seems like an elusive concept sometimes, with 6 children 9 and under and one more on the way (a recent delightful surprise!), but you continually give me ideas and motivation to keep going, and every little change truly does help!
Andrea says
wow — congratulations to you Sarah! 7 children under 10 will be busy, but hopefully in a good way. And… don’t think that a “peaceful home” means 100% quiet, calm, and clean all the time. You live in your home (with a whole bunch of kiddos!) so it should feel lived in and loved.
Donna Marie says
I think you should only use “indoor” voices indoors. No “outdoor” voices used inside for a calmer household.
Andrea says
this is a great tip, Donna! Thanks for sharing
Sonja says
What a truthful and uplifting message.
Helpful and practical.
Thank you.
Andrea says
you’re very welcome, Sonja! Thanks for your words of encouragement!
Liane says
Hi Andrea,
After reading Digital Minimalism (which took about a week, because it put me to sleep, but I learned a lot nonetheless) I realized why you bought a watch! I am in the middle of my digital withdrawal and I realized that there are two or three uplifting blogs I will continue to read, yours being one of them. Since we have completely automated our house with voice controlled devices there are a handful of notifications I still need to receive but I turned off nearly every app I could turn off and while I did not delete my Instagram, I suspended it and deleted the app. I did delete Facebook and Twitter and my newspaper app died on its own. I really am glad that you shared the book, because it’s life changing, and I’m glad and grateful for your posting this as well. I also discovered one huge huge time waster for me is commenting on blogs. So I unsubscribed from all of them. I’ll just pop in from time to time to see how your life is, and let you shine a bit on me. Oddly, I don’t miss social media nearly as much as I miss reading my blogs so I decided to keep three, yours being one of those, and committed to not straying down any rabbit holes.
— Liane
Andrea says
haha — I forgot to respond to this last week, but I had to tell you that I truly did laugh out loud when I read about how the book put you to sleep. Definitely written by a college professor and not the average reader. WOW, so many details and stories and statistics that I really didn’t need to know/read/hear, etc!
The book was fantastic in terms of the information I gained, but I feel like it could have been half as long 🙂
I agree with you that I don’t miss social media all that much. I still use Facebook for the marketplace feature (I buy and sell a lot on there these days). It does “waste” some time, but it also saves me time needing to shop for various items. Plus, I do enjoy it and make a decent amount of money from the things we sell.
Anyway, I’m thrilled you decided to keep my blog on the shortlist of ones you subscribe to (although I won’t be offended if you decide to unsubscribe again in the future). In the meantime, definitely get a watch, it has been fantastic for my life — no more checking my phone for the time. I must have done that 200 times a day (maybe not quite that much, but it feels like it!)
Suzanne says
Wow..lot’s of opinions in these comments! Love the quotes you shared, especially about loving our family from Mother Teresa. On raising children: no matter what you do, no matter what you think you are doing to influence what they believe or support…the most successful parent allows their child to be an independent thinker. I am hoping that instead of telling my children how to think, my actions, hopefully, guided them. Here is my quote for the day 🙂 It’s from Shakespeare…”There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” Isn’t wonderful to live in a country that supports freedom of speech!
Andrea says
Thanks Suzanne. I loved your line: “the most successful parent allows their child to be an independent thinker.” I sometimes feel like I hold the reigns too tightly (maybe because my kids are still so young). I can tell Nora is ready to make more decisions on her own and now always have us tell her what to do. I need to work on this!
Natalia says
Life is so much different! Different today than it was yesterday and different in my house than in someone else’s. And that’s okay. We might want to bring back the past and paste it on tomorrow. Or try to copy someone else’s experience into ours. Or try to fix theirs and make it look like ours. But we shouldn’t. No need for that.
I love this post and your perspective and I totally agree with you.
I too felt bad for not doing what I used to, in church, community, etc. I can choose to be frustrated about it, or choose to do what I can, creating positive ripples in my small circle. I can’t control if they even continue growing or stop. But I CAN do my small little part…. So help me God!
Thanks for the reminder and encouragement!
Andrea says
yes — it’s a very different world right now. But we can all do our own small part to make positive changes.
Debbie says
I don’t know how you’re able to write so well what I’ve been feeling all these past months as I watch the negative posts of some friends on social media that disrespects authorities, focuses on the negative of our situation, and just doesn’t produce anything constructive. It’s been so discouraging. All I can do is to stop reading their posts and focus on doing just what you wrote here. Thank you Andrea!
Andrea says
You’re welcome, Debbie! I’ve been away from social media (outside of a few blogging things) since June and I don’t miss it one bit!
Sally says
I love love love this post! Your thoughts go right along with the simple lessons I try to teach in my Bernie the One-Eyed Puppy books. Be kind. Look out for one another. The smallest actions or inactions can have tremendous effects.
Your post is life changing. Thank you for bringing this wisdom to all of us!
Andrea says
Ah yes — sweet Bernie 🙂
Thanks for the messages of peace and kindness you share with the world too, Sally
Anonymous says
Though you know me, I am posting anonymously because of the content. Maybe it will help someone. My son has gone through some extremely challenging years. He got into hard drugs and was in an abusive relationship, lived elsewhere, etc. He is doing good now and is clean and lives with us again. He doesn’t really like my husband and I talking about the news too much. With all the bad things going on, he said he has “lived it.” and doesn’t want to talk about it much. We have always had a peaceful home. Harmony in relationships is such a gift to our families. Every family has a different approach as to how much they want to advocate for something, etc. This is ours for now.
Andrea says
Thanks for sharing this!
One thing I didn’t mention in this post is that Dave is actually a totally News buff! He’s up on all the current events… but I’ve asked him only to share things with me that are neutral, positive, or VERY VERY important for me to know.
He has an excellent filter and since he’s not personally affected by the negative stuff like I am, it works well for our family.
I’m glad you found what’s working for your family (and I’m thrilled your son is doing so much better now).
Liane says
Glad you mentioned this because while I didn’t in my comment I was tempted. My husband is addicted to news sites and it causes great amounts of friction when I tell him I’m not interested in hearing anything political. He accuses me of being an ostrich, head in the sand. It’s very hard. I’m happy Dave has the sensitivity to hear you…,good filters are sorely lacking here. My defense is pretty simple. I find it easy to say hold that thought and leave the room and do something. Like start laundry or run the garbage disposal haha. He’s a bit absent minded (thank goodness!) so he forgets what he was going to say. But it’s a daily ongoing struggle. He doesn’t see the negative content he’s consuming. And I’m powerless to do much but pray.
Andrea says
Thanks for sharing this Liane,
I can’t speak for your husband, but Dave truly doesn’t seem to be negatively affected by reading and listening to the news. I think different personality types can process negative information better than others. He just read it and moves on — where I would sit and think about it for hours afterward, and then bring it back to mind over and over throughout the coming weeks and months (I’m still haunted by a news article I read YEARS ago — about abuse to children in 3rd world countries). I can still see the pictures, remember various quotes from the article, etc.) Dave isn’t like that. He just pushes it out of his brain and moves on.
I guess for me, I just figure if he enjoys reading the news, I don’t worry about it. Of course, I’m glad he doesn’t share it all with me!! I do think your idea of leaving the room for a bit sounds like a healthy compromise for now.
Alicia says
I am the exact same way, Andrea! My husband also is up on all the current events, not effected by it whatsoever, and we have the same arrangement. It seriously saves my mental health beyond measure. Thank you for this truly positive, breath of fresh air! It’s much needed. God bless !
Andrea says
Thanks Alicia, sounds like you have a great hubby too 🙂
Bonnie'sMama says
Hi Andrea,
For years now I have also chosen not to read news and to discuss it as little as possible. Many people seem to think this is irresponsible for an adult, but I do not have the mental and emotional and spiritual energy to handle all the news we have pouring at us all the time. I’m like you–I remember the details for years and those things spin in my mind endlessly. My mood can be depressed and I can battle fear for days because of some new development in politics, medicine, law, etc.
My husband enjoys watching the political scene; to him it’s an interesting, unfolding story. Like you and Dave, we have agreed he will only tell me details I really have to know. I am so grateful my husband is willing to protect my mental health in this way.
All that to say, THANK YOU for being brave enough to write about this, to explain your reasons, and how much it’s helped you. It helps me to stand firm in my choices about news consumption and news discussions.
Andrea says
One more way you and I are so much alike! 🙂
I’m glad this works for you and your hubby too — and yes, sometimes just knowing someone else feels/believes the same way you do makes it feel so much easier and more “normal”!
Bonnie'sMama says
Andrea, today my husband and I are signing the paperwork for our will, etc. You wrote about this in April 2014, and it’s been percolating in my mind ever since. We rarely leave our four small children, but when my husband and I went to a concert 3.5 hours away without the children back in mid-March, I thought, what if something happens to us on this trip?!
We called an attorney within the next week. Finally today we’re finishing it up. Thank you for pushing me in that direction all those years ago!
Andrea says
oh wow — this is so fun for me to read! I’m thrilled my little nudge back in 2014 got you to take action all these years later.
You will feel such peace of mind once this is all taken care of!
Michelle says
I loved this. Thank you for the best message I’ve heard in 2020
Andrea says
You’re welcome, Michelle — I appreciate your longtime readership 🙂
Michelle says
Brilliant and so simply put!
Andrea says
Thanks Michelle 🙂
Maybe a bit too simple since I failed to elaborate on a few clarifying details that have caused a bit of tension. But simple it is — that’s my goal around here 🙂
Elizabeth says
Here, I fixed it:
#1: Consider the source and get in the habit of fact checking. Keep in mind that a minor inconvenience for you may be of vital importance for someone else.
#2: Look at situations from other people’s perspective. Don’t argue every point; pick the vital ones that have real life impact and state your points clearly and concisely.
#3: improve the quality of your online life by being picky about how you spend your screen time and with whom. Stay attentive to how it affects your offline life.
#4: ok sure. I basically covered this in my #1
#5: be a proactive realist. Don’t wallow in negativity, but also avoid cultivating the strained false optimism that plagues the new age and self help arenas. If you gloss over problems, they tend to fester, so try to address them as soon as you notice them. Ask for help if anxiety, depression, and anger are drowning out everything else. Treasure what you love (including yourself).
#6: fine as-is
#7: works to a point. Make sure the “house” you consider under your control is not strictly synonymous with your physical house, though. Sometimes it’s your body, sometimes your family, sometimes a community/institution, sometimes as large as your town, county, state, country. Focus up close most of the time but don’t assume you have no ability to directly impact a larger circle — and not just by ripple effect.
Andrea says
Thank you for sharing this Elizabeth.
I do wonder why you suggested your list of 7 as a “fix” to my list… instead of just a different viewpoint?
After all… your #2 clearly states “look at situations from other people’s perspective”.
Your list is from your perspective, my list is from mine.
Neither is right or wrong — better or worse. Just different, and that’s OK in my book 🙂
Sally says
100% agree this is not a “fix”, just a different opinion/perspective.
Dan says
I appreciate your comment about respecting authority. Every child at least needs to respect the position of parent, otherwise there would be chaos in the family. We can respect the position of leaders and try to understand just how incredibly difficult it is to lead people in any capacity. Like you said, we don’t have to vote for them or like them, but rather than disrespecting leaders, we should feel free try to step up to their jobs (roles) and see if we really can do a better job. If so, all of society wins, if not, maybe we grow in humility. Thank you, Andrea.
Andrea says
You’re welcome, Dan.
Your statement makes me think of the popular cliché about “walking a mile in their shoes”.
I think we’d gain a lot of respect for authority figures if we had to walk even a few inches in their shoes!
Janine says
Thanks so much for such a positive post amidst all the negative stuff online and in the news. Love it!
Andrea says
You’re welcome, Janine.
My thought process was “positive” even if some may not have taken it that way!
Susanne says
This might be the best piece you have ever written!
Andrea says
What a compliment — thanks, Susanne!
Nellie says
I think this is the most interesting post you have written (yes I have read them ALL). I mostly disagree, but thank you for giving me another perspective.
Andrea says
Wow! I appreciate your faithful readership and your willingness to peacefully disagree 🙂
Karen says
Love it! Very well written! Thank you for all the time and effort you put into your blog, I enjoy reading your content.
Andrea says
You’re welcome Karen — I appreciate your kind words.
Sarah says
Thank you for talking to such important issues! I appreciate your sentiments and your ability to break down poignant topics into simple, practical solutions.
I’m taking note ( I always take notes from your posts ) of “restore us from the day and ready us for tomorrow.” This is a great mission statement parameter for a home keeper.
Your heart comes through here, reminding us to take “control” of what’s right in front of us before heading out to take on the big battles of the world.
Blessings to you, my friend.
Andrea says
Thank you, Sarah (I’m a fellow note taker too — LOL!)
When I think about the home environment I want to create for myself, my family, and anyone who visits, the idea of “restore us from the day and ready us for tomorrow” is almost always what I consider. It’s what I can do with my gifts to serve my people. Maybe not the whole world — but I know it counts for something!
Aja says
I love this blog, I’ve been following it for years! I do feel, however, that this post is written largely from a perspective of privilege. My first hint was when I saw the term “hateful riots” at the beginning. Some of these riots are people truly getting out of hand for the joy of it, but a lot of these riots are born from a long history of peaceful protests that have been ignored, squashed or violently torn down. A lot of people don’t have the option to close themselves off and mind their own business (which seems to be the running theme through this post) because the things that are going on in the world affect them so personally. Can you really turn off social media/ not watch the news/ separate entirely from the BLM movement when you are raising a house full of young black boys? “Respect” authority when it is opposing your basic human rights? There are so many troubling things going on in the world, and as a mom of 6 young kids I know that I, too, cannot be out in the protest line. But I CAN model empathy, recognize my privilege (and use it to stand up for injustice even just in my small circle), use spiritual tools like prayer to help affect change in the world. We can all do these thing easily, simply, and without being constantly attached to the TV or news stand, but at the same time acknowledge that we have resources (some intangible) that the world/ society could use to progress.
Thanks for the amazing blog Andrea!
-Aja
Eileen says
This was also my feeling throughout my reading.
I’m sad to read about unsubscribing from newspapers. Journalism is always important, but people do not realize that *local* journalism keeps your local governments accountable. Local journalists show up at school board meetings and town council meetings and county board meetings and state legislature meetings so we can all be informed about decisions that are made that impact us and our neighbors. It reveals corruption that benefit the few over the many. I could go on and on.
We all benefit from a fair and educated and healthy community even if we have the resources and privilege to create that in our personal lives.
yettie says
I struggled to find the words to express my reaction to this post so I thank you for capturing it well Aja.
It’s definitely easy to advocate for peace at all costs when the status quo favors you and is not a threat to your children. Not everyone in the world is afforded that same privilege. I can’t agree with this post. Putting yourself in a bubble might give you peace but it doesn’t change the world or bring good to anyone else outside of your immediate circle.
And no, not all authority figures deserve respect. Unquestioning respect is why abuse has thrived in sacred places where it shouldn’t be found.
Andrea says
Thank you for sharing, yettie.
I have a few things I’d like to clarify in case it helps 🙂
#1. It’s completely OK if you don’t agree with my post. I’m not offended and I don’t expect everyone to agree.
#2. I am 100% confident that creating peace within my home and family brings a MASSIVE amount of good to many people outside my immediate circle. I have countless examples I could share but won’t for personal reasons. It’s like the ripple effect in a pond… a little change goes a long way (consider, for example, the fact that my blog reaches hundreds of thousands of homes every month with the message of simplicity, contentment, happiness, fulfillment, etc.)
#3. I did not say authority figures deserve “unquestioning respect” just “respect”. We can still question them and make informed choices to promote change. But we can do this from a place of respect (not talking negatively about them, but rather talking positively about the changes we’d like to see, etc.)
I know — that’s long (sorry!) but I hope these clarifications help you understand where I’m coming from. 🙂
Liz says
Adding my voice to this feeling too. I was disappointed by the “hateful” adjective to riot. People don’t sustain riots if it’s just a whim. The riots going on at the moment and previously were because of long standing inequality. Andrea, I am sad that you have decided that the status quo is good enough. I’m sad that you are teaching your children that they should do what their authority figures say without thinking about what their actions may cause. There are a lot of reasons why children shouldn’t be taught to blindly follow orders. Mainly because they can be taken advantage of, both as children but also when they grow up. We want our children to grow up to be people who have a positive impact on their community but if you always follow authority automatically people pretending to be authorised can take advantage. As a minor example, look at multi level marketing companies. They pretend that they can help your finances, but they statistically do a lot more harm than good.
Michelle says
I’m pretty sure Andrea is a wonderful mother that we can all learn a few things from. It’s really ok to not attack a woman as a mother when we disagree. That’s been overdone in our society for far too long.
Liz says
I agree that we shouldn’t attack – I think maybe my tone didn’t coming through the way I wanted it to. I’ve been following Andrea since before Nora was born. I have much love and respect for all the simply living Andrea has proposed over the years but I disagree with the idea that we should ignore people who are telling us that they are hurting. There are so many examples throughout history of people abusing power. I don’t want her or her family or the people who she has influence over to be hurt.
I care about Andrea, so I am letting her know that I disagree with some of her points.
Michelle says
Thanks for your reply. I don’t get that message from her post. I think she’s very wise and teaching her children the right things. If this wasn’t a blog and we were all in the same room I feel like we could have such a fun talk as longtime readers about all the fun and practical ideas we’ve learned from her! Sending you both blessings and love
Andrea says
You ladies are the best — AND, just between us 3 (and everyone reading this comment thread, LOL!) I’ve been working on way to bring a little bit more community to my blog — specifically for those of you who have been around for ages! I’m still fine-tuning some of the details, but hope to share more in the next month!
Exciting stuff!
Chris says
This sounds awesome! I’m looking forward to it!
Andrea says
Thanks Liz!
First of all, I removed the word “hateful” 🙂
Also, I *think* you may have read into the Respect Authority part just a bit (or maybe I didn’t make my point well enough??)
I really never said anything about “the status quo being good enough” or “teaching my children to blindly follow orders”.
In my opinion “following orders” has nothing to do with respecting authority. My thoughts when I mentioned “respecting authority” were that we acknowledge they are the appointed leader and we should not bad talk them to others or try to demean them simply because we may not agree with them. We can still work towards change if we feel that is appropriate, but we shouldn’t do so at the expense of another person.
I’m honestly coming at it from a Biblical perspective (Hebrews 13:17, Romans 13:1 to names a couple of sources)
And for the record, I’m totally on the same page with you when it comes to Multi-Level Marketing 😉
Thanks for your support — I didn’t take it in an “offensive” way at all. I know you’ve been hanging around here for a long time!
Michelle says
A protest is not the same thing as a riot. We’ve seen both in recent months in our country. And there have been instances of hateful groups taking part. I don’t think Andrea is trying to speak on the riots or protests in her post, but rather on what to do when the constant trickle of news and media spin begins to threaten our peace of mind.
Chris says
I think all the commenters who are disagreeing, are actually exemplifying one of the points Andrea is making. That we can disagree respectfully and give our viewpoint, thought different, in a respectful fashion. It is actually refreshing to see comments like these as compared to other aspects of the media where there is screaming, name calling, and swearing. Just something I thought of while reading comments. Blessings to everyone!
Andrea says
Hey Chris! Great minds think alike — I was actually going to mention the same thing 🙂
I’m honestly loving reading through (and responding) to the comments today. My readers are awesome people — they’re even nice when they disagree (at least most of the time — LOL!)
Andrea says
Yes, this is exactly right — thank you for putting it in “plain English” for anyone who might have misinterpreted anything in my post 🙂
Andrea says
Thank you Aja!
I loved your statement “But I CAN model empathy, recognize my privilege (and use it to stand up for injustice even just in my small circle), use spiritual tools like prayer to help affect change in the world. We can all do these things easily, simply, and without being constantly attached to the TV or news stand, but at the same time acknowledge that we have resources (some intangible) that the world/ society could use to progress.”
This is SO true — I appreciate you sharing your thoughts to add to the conversation.
Mary Ann says
Beautiful message Andrea! I’ve followed you on and off for a few years and I think this simple post is one of your best! I have at least a decade on you and it gives me hope to hear such wisdom from a young faith filled mom. Thank you!
Andrea says
Wow — thanks Mary Ann.
JJ says
This is the best post/article/etc. I’ve read addressing these important truths. You have a gift for verbalizing truths that allow self-reflection, change, and action. Thank you!!!
Andrea says
That’s a lovely statement — maybe a little over-the-top (but I’ll take it!) LOL 🙂
Annette Silveira says
I like that you have delved into a much more serious topic, but I have to push back on your statement about respecting authority. The first definition I find for respect is “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities or achievements.” There is a lot to not admire about leadership in many areas right now. I think a better approach would be to acknowledge that, yes, that person is in charge or, yes, that is the policy, but I do not agree, and I am going to do what I can to make sure it changes. I don’t believe disagreeing but letting authority have its way does anyone any good.
Eileen says
All I could think of is if everyone “respected authority” in history, that women wouldn’t have the right to vote, Jim Crow laws would still be in place (I guess you could go back and talk about slavery), etc.
I wrote a lot more but deleted it. So just suffice it to say that if you believe a representative government is not something we all have a hand in “controlling”, then you come from a very different place than me.
I appreciate the honestly here, but it’s from a very privileged place to ignore the news and always respect authority.
Andrea says
Thank you Eileen, You mention several good points!
I do want to clarify that when I say “respect” authority, I don’t mean “bow down and let them have their way with us” (slavery is not even close to my thought process here). Rather, I acknowledge that these people have been placed in a position of authority over me and I will not talk badly about them or try to demean them (even if I don’t agree with their choices). I can still definitely work towards change, but I can do it while still being respectful.
As far as coming from a privileged perspective, that may be true… but it’s also a Biblical perspective as we’re clearly called to “respect authority” (with God as the ultimate authority).
Andrea says
Thank you for sharing, Annette!
I’m nodding along as I read your comment 🙂
I do NOT think we need to “agree with” or “like” or “support” decisions made by authority figures… and I don’t think we should “let authority have its way” either.
When I say “respect” I mean that we should not talk badly about them behind their backs or belittle their decisions. We can still certainly fight for change… in a respectful way.
I’m thinking specifically about school and church leaders who constantly deal with people negatively voicing their opinions within the school and church communities even though they don’t necessarily step up to do anything about it. That’s not “respect” in my opinion — and I don’t want my children to see me act this way.
That said, there are many definitions of “respect” the one you sited is a good one too.
Liz says
I think the problem that some people are having with the word respect is that sometimes “respect” is used as a way of saying “do what this person is telling you even if you disagree with it”. I suggest looking up the concept of tone policing. The idea is that people say “oh you are just too emotional about this topic to be able to have any rational points, so I’m not even going to entertain your point of view.”
I am happy that I have stuck around to read your responses Andrea, I think I read your “hateful riots” and “respect authority” and then made assumptions. I hope you read my comments and understand I am just scared that there are people who are hurting who you’ve written off because they are responding to their pain in a way you don’t care for.
Andrea says
I’m loving all the comments and appreciate your willingness to stick around and participate! This is great stuff 🙂
Mary Dolan says
Wonderful post.
Andrea says
Thanks Mary 🙂
Erin says
Love this…so true and such a wonderful reminder.
Andrea says
Thank you Erin!
Ann says
The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world!
Credit: unknown
Andrea says
That’s a great quote — thanks for sharing, Ann!