Inside: Weekends shouldn’t be jam-packed and chaotic. These 6 strategies will help you enjoy a slower, simpler, more restful weekend (starting this week!)
Dave and I regularly joke that we don’t go on vacation because it’s too much hassle — especially with 4 young children. We literally feel like we need a vacation after our vacation just to regroup and gear up for normal life again.
In the same light, we like to keep our weekends very low-key and free.
Dave’s school responsibilities require long hours, late nights, and early mornings Monday through Friday. He usually has a pile of school work to tackle at home every weekend, so in his free time, he prefers to “lay low” as much as possible on Saturdays and Sundays — a request I am more than happy to comply with!
After all, who wants to get to Monday morning, only to feel the need for another day off to “recover” from a busy, stressful, too-full weekend?
Sadly, this is the reality for so many in our busy-obsessed culture… but it doesn’t have to be!
We are in control of our time, we can choose how we spend our “free” days each week.
We can take our weekends back… for good!
Before we get too far into today’s topic, I must pause and ask you to read with an open mind. I know there are an unlimited number of excuses for why my strategies might not work… but you know what they say about excuses, right?
Excuses make sure our lives stay the same as they were yesterday.
~ Annonymous
Truthfully, what works for me might not work for you, but if you’d like your weekends to feel simpler and rested instead of stressful and rushed… a different approach might be just what you need.
After more than a decade of helping families simplify their homes and lives, and a lifetime of pursuing a simpler life for myself, I’m confident the strategies below are doable for the vast majority of families.
I don’t promise it will always be easy or fun, and in many cases, these strategies could take a while to fully implement. But if you want your weekends back, if you crave a little downtime (with family, friends, or alone), if you’d like to feel more rested and refreshed for the week ahead, the strategies below are worth your effort.
Trust me!
1. Tackle Laundry Before the Weekend
Laundry is one of the TOP complaints I hear about weekend busyness — it seems to magically multiple throughout the week until there’s enough dirty clothing to require a full day of laundry each weekend.
Definitely not how I want to spend my Saturdays!
To be fair, I occasionally do throw in a load of laundry on Saturday morning, but for the most part, I do all our laundry on Tuesday mornings and Friday evenings — a routine that has worked wonders for me over the last 5+ years.
I know families with 2 working parents who do one or two loads every evening (Monday through Friday) and take the weekends off.
I have another friend who starts one load every morning before work. She changes it out on her lunch break and puts it away when she gets home.
And many others choose to delegate laundry to their spouse or children throughout the week.
NOTE: I know these ideas might not work perfectly for your specific situation — the point is, there are SO many out-of-the-box ways you can fit laundry into your weekdays and elliminate that mountian of laundry waiting for you on the weekend.
Read more about simplifying laundry.
2. Clean After the Weekend
For years and years, my goal was to have the house thoroughly cleaned by the time Dave got home from school on Friday afternoons. I figured this would free up our weekends a bit… and it did.
However, I often felt annoyed by how dirty things got with everyone home all weekend (and various friends, neighbors, or relatives dropping by)… so I’d do a bunch more cleaning on Monday again.
Then I got smart 😉
I now do a fairly thorough full-house clean every Monday morning and don’t think about cleaning all that much during the week (or over the weekend).
I do quick touch-ups in the bathrooms and kitchen throughout the week (as needed) and I always wipe down the toilets and sinks if we have company on the weekends. Other than that, my “save the cleaning for Monday” routine has made for a much more relaxing weekend.
As an added bonus, I enjoy a clean house ALL DAY Monday since Clara is the only one home with me and she’s not overly messy on her own!
NOTE: if you are home with many young children, this system might not be as effective for you, but I’m confident there are plenty of options to reduce the amount of time you spend cleaning on the weekends (like tackling one cleaning task each weekday).
3. Prep and Plan Your Menu
It’s a popular trend to spend the weekend prepping food for the week… but since I don’t want to be stuck in the kitchen all weekend, I actually take the exact opposite approach!
Although I do enjoy cooking (most of the time) I’ve found that cooking throughout the week is much more enjoyable when I get a break on the weekends.
Of course, I can’t totally close the kitchen (we still need to eat) but I can plan ahead in an effort to cut back on my time in the kitchen without resorting to fast food all weekend.
Breakfast Leftovers:
Almost every Friday morning, I make a big batch of waffles, sausage, bacon, and sometimes muffins or a quiche. We then reheat these foods for breakfast on Saturday and Sunday (with the addition of fresh fruit, yogurt, and eggs).
This means I can still serve hot breakfasts every morning with very little effort — in fact, Dave usually takes over one of the mornings which is such treat for me.
Dinner Leftovers:
This same concept can be applied to other meals throughout the week as well.
We often “save up” leftovers for the weekend, letting everyone pick and choose their favorites and re-working various ingredients for a “new meal” with very little effort or mess.
NOTE: if you normally eat leftovers for lunch, consider packing a sandwich instead and saving your leftovers for the weekend. It might not work, but it’s worth a try!
Plan for a Meal Out:
It’s not unusual for us to swing through Culvers, order a pizza, or make a frozen pizza for one of our weekend meals, but these outings are planned in advance (not a last-minute thought when I’m too exhausted to cook).
Dave and I have never been big on “date nights” but if that’s something you enjoy, I encourage you to stick with it and save the leftovers for your kiddos!
Whatever you choose, I’m confident a little time away from the kitchen will leave you more refreshed and ready to embrace another week of “we’re hungry” and “what’s for dinner” requests!
4. Use a Weekly To-Do List to
A few weeks ago, I shared how I improve my efficiency and productivity with weekly to-do lists. Since then, SO many of you have shared your weekly to-do list success stories with me!
YAY 🥳
It’s true, utilizing a weekly to-do list is one of my top tips to tackle so many of those nagging “to-do-someday” tasks that often fill up our weekends because we didn’t make time to do them during the week.
Some weekend projects and errands are inevitable (or maybe you’re the type who actually enjoys running errands on the weekend) but if you prefer to stay home on the weekends, a weekly to-do list might be your solution!
5. Edit Your Weekend Activities
We are at the stage in life where the vast majority of our friends, neighbors, relatives, etc. spend countless precious weekend hours driving their children to and from various sporting events and school, church, or community activities.
We see them as they come and go, in and out of their driveways all day Saturday (often on Sundays too). We see their pictures on social media with captions like “another whirlwind weekend with 3 soccer games, 2 football games, a youth group party, and an all-day school tennis tournament.”
Friends, I know we’re told this busy weekend lifestyle is “normal” but I’m here to tell you there are other options!
Dave and I have very intentionally chosen to keep our weekends (and our evenings) free from almost all outside events and activities — especially activities that pull our family in opposite directions. (No, this was/is not easy, but we feel it’s worth it).
We still participate in church events, we still hang out with friends and family, we still have lots of fun on the weekends… but it’s on our own terms and it’s almost always a family affair.
In many ways, our current society has created a culture that revolves around the “Fear Of Missing Out”. As parents, we are lead to believe that our children will somehow “miss out” on valuable opportunities if they aren’t involved in multiple sport, music, art, and community programs.
I realize there are many benefits to learning and experiencing a wide range of activities… but based on my own extensive experience with extra-curricular activities, I’m not convinced our children’s lives will be worse off by not participating in every single opportunity that comes their way.
An added bonus: Fewer weekend games and activities mean fewer mid-week practices and meetings — which means more time available during the week to eat together as a family, pick away at meal prep, cleaning, & laundry, and get to bed on time (so mornings are less rushed).
It’s all a cycle that ends with feeling rested and relaxed or rushed and resentful.
YOU get to choose.
I could fill pages with my thoughts on this topic… but for now, I simply encourage you to scale back a bit.
If your weekends feel frazzled, rushed, and chaotic, rework your schedule so you aren’t gone as much… or if you are gone, make sure it’s for an activity your entire family can participate in (not just sitting on the sidelines watching one child).
NOTE: This might be a totally new thought process for you… chances are, it will take a while to implement as you won’t necessarily want to drop out of something mid-season. Just keep your goals and values in mind and continue making progress.
6. Make a Weekend Bucket List
I know from experience how easy it can be to squander our weekend hours away without much to show for them (fun, work, or otherwise).
Dave and I try to create some sort of “weekend bucket list” on Fridays so we’re both on the same page throughout the weekend.
Our lists include things like:
- haircuts for the boys
- visit the library
- movie night on Friday (a newish tradition our family really enjoys)
- dinner with relatives on Sunday
- clean out the garage
- go for a bike ride
- leaves (a perpetual weekend project from October through December!)
- make cookies
- disassemble and move the swingset
- have a fire with s’ mores
- specific school projects for Dave and blog projects for me
We currently have many outdoor projects on our weekend list… soon we’ll have more holiday parties and activities on our list.
The point is: we are intentional about how we spend our weekend hours.
As a result, we go to bed most Sunday evenings feeling rested and refreshed — ready for our 4 am alarm and for another productive week ahead.
Your Next Steps…
I realize the thought of implementing all 6 strategies might sound overwhelming… my solution is to “start small”.
Choose ONE strategy and test it out for a few weeks to see if it works for you (tweaking as necessary). Then add another strategy.
Any of these strategies will make a difference in the feel and flow of your weekend — and implementing one is always better than feeling overwhelmed and not implementing any.
Don’t let yourself get discouraged and don’t let your friends or family members “rain on your parade”. Just keep pushing forward… it will be worth it!
Start small and start today… you might be surprised where you find yourself in a few months!
Additional Reading
I highly recommend each of these books if you’re feeling that tug to slow down — look for them at your local library!
It’s time to take your weekends back… for good!
If a simpler home and life is something you value, you won’t regret the sacrifices you make now to create that reality for your family for years to come.
I’d love to know… is there anything specific you do (big or small) to enjoy simpler, slower, more relaxing weekends? Share in the comments below!
Bridget says
Love that you talk about “the fear of missing out” in our society. It is so true, and we are swept into that so easily. This summer I read a book from my local library titled, The Joy of Missing Out by Tonya Dalton. It’s a wonderful idea of how we can reclaim our lives and center them around what we want, that which will bring “joy” instead of what we “fear” we may be missing.
Andrea says
There’s no way we won’t miss out on some things in life — after all, it’s not physically possible to do all, see all, and be everywhere at once!
The less I know about what others around me are doing, the happier I am… and I’m totally putting that book on my library list. Thanks 🙂
Penny Doolin says
Just curious. What time do you go to bed when you get up at 4 AM?
Andrea says
This school year, we’re waking up closer to 5:00 so we aren’t getting to be as early, but when we woke up at 4:00, we’d often try to be in bed by 9:30.
Amanda DeBoe says
This post is so timely for me! Food prep is something that takes so much of my time and energy. I used to do it on Saturdays and my left me tired and took away from down time. Now I split it between Thursdays and Fridays so I get it done during the work week and it feels SO SO SO good to have it done!
Andrea says
ah yes — food prep!
I spent a good amount of time yesterday morning prepping lots of food for the weekend, but then getting 2 days “off” from cooking (mostly) is worth it for me!
Glad you are having a mostly “cooking free” weekend too!
Kristen says
I just got to read this (a little Friday night relaxation?? haha) and I have to say – I love these kinds of posts! Such practical advice and surely everyone can find at least one or two new things to try, even if every tip won’t work for every person. Thanks for the great food for thought!!
Andrea says
Thanks Kristen 🙂
I hope you enjoyed your relaxing Friday night!
Beth says
Hi Andrea,
I really appreciate this post. Our weekends are similar. I was just curious, with your older three kids, do you work on sports skills at home just with the family? Things like hitting a baseball/softball or tennis? I have been comparing my kids to the neighbor boys (a no-no, I know), and those boys are so good at hitting tennis balls back and forth (in our street). I think my kids’ lack of those excellent hand/eye coordination skills are probably due to lack of organized sports. I guess we could just work on it at home??
Andrea says
Hi Beth,
We do often play sports with our kids in our yard — although I hesitate to say we “work with them” on their skills. It’s pretty low-key — Tee-ball, wiffle ball, soccer, hockey, tennis, badminton, basketball, volleyball, etc.
It helps that we have a huge yard and a really long driveway too!
We have purchased them all tennis rackets, hockey sticks, bats, gloves, etc. (from local thrift stores or garage sales) and we have lots of balls, so it’s easy for them to just pick a sibling and play together too.
I think hand-eye coordination can be learned in many ways other than sports — and although I grew up in a very sports-obsessed family, I will say that I’ve done absolutely nothing with sports after college… so it’s just a small season of life!
Rebecca Tabb says
Just wanted you to know that I put a few of these things into practice last weekend. I stayed on top of the laundry all week. And I didn’t try to clean the house Friday night like I usually do, only to be annoyed when it gets messed up by 9 o’clock Saturday morning. We had a super relaxing weekend that was not full of me cleaning but rather lots of family time and reading time and I can’t wait to do it again this weekend!
Andrea says
I’m smiling from ear to ear right now, Rebecca! Wow, I’m so thrilled with the improvements you noticed after just implementing 2 of my 6 ideas!!
Thanks so much for taking the time to share with me — seriously, it just made my day!
Verna says
We’ve implemented some of these same strategies when our five kids were young. Now, we have teenagers and kids over twenty who’s idea of a good time is being home together as a family. The rewards for sticking to our guns when other people thought we were crazy! Another reward is kids who are content to be at home and don’t need to be entertained all the time. Blessings on you for spending quality time with your kids!
Andrea says
This is SO reassuring to hear, Verna! Thanks for sharing 🙂
I do sometimes wonder if we should try to do more… but every time I consider it, I think “no, we like being home… let’s just be happy at home!”
Debbie says
Free weekends are the best! Every other weekend this happens since I only do laundry every other Saturday. I like the idea of doing my laundry on a week night to free up my weekend. I’ll have to give this one a try. No matter what though, weekends go by so fast.
Andrea says
Yes, we love low-key weekends! And yes, you should totally consider doing laundry during the week. It feels like a huge treat to enjoy a laundry-free weekend!
Natalia Gramada says
I kept saying “yes, yes and yes!” throughout reading this post. I guard my time ferociously and weekends are top priority.
I have divided my weekly tasks into themes (your ideas, I’m sure).
Because Saturdays are our days of rest and worship, spending intentional time with God, family and friends is all that goes on my to do list for that day, and family events often spill into Sundays. Other than that, we MIGHT tackle a large project at home on Sunday (like cleaning the garden or painting a room), or we just go on an outing with family (and plan a drive-thru meal, which is a treat for the girls) or just… hang low. No shopping, running errands, or mundane chores.
That means that the rest of my week days are focused and I must stay on track. But, it’s so worth it and it’s so wonderful to know that when I’m done with my Papers (including digital) on Monday, I will NOT worry about them for the next 7 days!
When time is over on Tuesdays, I pack the rest of the “clothing” projects until next week, no matter how much ironing, steaming, sewing and mending there’s left to do…
Wednesdays are Clean the fridge days, when I cook for 2 days and make lists (to buy, to use, to cook). Also, because my high-schooler has a short school day, I would often plan for some 1/1 time with her.
Thursdays I have a set appointment and I group all the other errands before or after, including grocery shopping, errands and dropping off donations (that I sorted and placed in the car on Tuesday)
Friday is another big cooking day (I took a break on Thursday!) and I make sure I have enough variety prepared for the next 2 days. Also, it’s a “vacuum the whole house” day.
It’s such a great feeling on Friday evening to know that the work is done, and whatever is not… it will just have to wait for Monday morning!
One of the “next” things we’re working on as a family is to limit the use of electronics, especially on weekends. Time is way too precious!
Andrea says
Oh I love your weekly tasks (and yes, I used to do that more when my kiddos were really little — it helped me to focus on just one thing every day). Now I do better with one morning of cleaning and then not thinking about it for the rest of the week.
And yes, Dave and I are also being more conscious about our “screen time”. Our kids don’t have access to any devices so it’s just an occasional netflix show for them… but I’ve gotten into a not-so-great habit of using my phone for a lot more than just phone calls. I think I’m being “good” by staying away from my computer all evening, but then I use my phone more to respond to emails and such.
Now, I’m giving myself time limits and when the time is up, I’m done. This has been particularly helpful in my line of work when the number of updates, comments, emails, etc. is basically endless. I could spend all day responding to messages and working on tasks that COULD benefit my blog… but I don’t want to live like that. So I do as much as I can in my time limit and then shut down for a bit!
Kim says
I retired this year from part time work so I realize I am blessed to have a slower pace. Hubby is still full time.
I think it is also important for me to shop Monday-Friday so I can get out of the way for full-time workers who must do so on weekends. A win-win for all.
Andrea says
so considerate of you with your weekly shopping! I always go during the week too (but usually selfishly so I don’t have to face the huge weekend crowds) Maybe I’ll reframe my thought process and think of the full-time workers who I’m making more space for on the weekends.
Ashley says
Yes to all of this!! I’ve been much more intentional about getting the house clean during the week, I have a designated laundry day (Mondays), and we don’t partake in many scheduled activities. We’ve been much more intentional about doing a fun family activity together on Saturday, and try to reserve Sunday afternoons for low-key time at home (a day of rest!). We’re in the process of moving into town from our rural location and are looking forward to having people in our home more. But like you said, this will be an intentional, planned time, not something to add more stress. The time goes by too quickly to spend it all frantically running in every direction!
Andrea says
wow — you’re moving! So exciting (and probably a lot of work too — but exciting!)
I’m sure you’ll love being closer to friends and family!
JJ says
I’m snackin’ what you’re packin’! Being together as a family is truly priceless!!! My dad set that example by always doing something(whether at home or some place fun) every Saturday. Bike rides to local parks and a stop at 7/11 for a slurpee was a favorite treat! Rainy days were spent playing games or watching a movie. Euchre is my favorite card game to this day, and I was shocked in college that people from all over the country had never heard of it. Haha! Apparently it’s a Michigan/Ohio thing? Sunday was church, and family came over to have lunch(normally leftovers and/or sandwiches/soup). Now my husband and I enjoy the weekends with our kiddos, too. We do house/yard projects while they help here and there and play(a great way for me and my husband to play, too!). This past Saturday we painted. My 7 year old son got a paint roller to fit with a pole that we just couldn’t get. Haha! We also try to take one day to go to a place where we can walk/hike–our local park with an exercise trail is great. The kids love to ride their scooters while we walk. We also got Chuckle and Roar’s Scavenger Hunt 3 pack of cards at Target early in the summer. There is one pack for the home, one pack for the car, and one pack for outside. We’ve had so much fun with this!!! You have 3-5 cards at a time and as a family look for the one thing that’s on each card. It’s a family win to find them, and it’s helped them learn new things.
A Friday routine really sets us up well. I video chat with my dad(out of state), and my kids talk to him while I put in frozen pizzas and prep sides while cleaning my kitchen so we have little mess after). My husband comes home knowing we are excited for pizza and a movie/show.
One of the things I am going to apply from your post is to get my prep for Monday(work and homeschool) done on Friday. Sometimes anticipation while prepping during the weekend can steal the weekend joy. Thanks again for always inspiring!!!
Andrea says
haha — everything about your comment made me smile!
Yes, Eucher is totally a Michigan/Ohio thing… and Yes to 7/11 Slurpees and Friday night pizza!
As for prepping school work the week before — I totally relate to this. That’s why I decided to upload new posts on Tuesdays so I wouldn’t have to think about any last-minute things over the weekend. I can use Mondays to wrap up anything — it’s glorious!
Alissa says
I was just thinking about this yesterday! My husband is a pastor (and maybe a bit of a workaholic!). We don’t have weekends in the traditional sense (he rarely takes a full 24 hours off – his choice) BUT he does have some flexibility in his schedule (we went to the zoo in the middle of the week last week). I do a fairly good job of staying on top of the laundry and household chores during the week, but wish we had time on weekends to tackle projects (my kids like to be “helpers” and I wish I had another set of hands). I was brain storming ways I could take on some of the projects in pieces but also how I could celebrate the weekend too. I might start watching a movie during nap time on Saturdays or reading for the entire time, something fun. My kids are little – 3.5 years old, 1.5 years old, and arriving in January. How do you talk to your kids about extracurricular activities? My 3.5 year old already has people asking him if he will play soccer next year and his eyes light up each time. I don’t want to squash his fun but I also don’t want to start juggling practices and games and snacks etc (especially with a baby under the age of 1). Maybe in a few years it will be different, but for now, I just like being home.
Andrea says
yes, I was going to address all the people who work weekends and mention something about choosing a different day during the week to rest, but then I felt like that opened a whole new can of worms that would get me off topic!
I think it’s an awesome idea to carve out a little time for yourself on Saturdays. As a mom of (almost) 3 very young kiddos, that’s hard to do — but so worth it!
As for your question about the sports… we have our kids do various summer sports camps in the summer and that usually satisfies them! They all did soccer camp the same week/same time and they all did tennis camp the same week/same time. It’s during the day, I only need to make one trip, it’s at a local school, and I just read a book while they have camp.
They get really excited about the camps and are totally ready to ‘move on’ once the camp is finished. That might be an option for you??
Obviously, if they show a really strong desire and are an appropriate age, we would not prohibit them from joining a sports team — but we certainly aren’t going to force them if they don’t inquire about it!
Rebecca says
I wish I could stand up and clap for this post. It’s so good! I work full time and am currently feeling a little overworked on the weekends. I am spending more time cleaning than I want for sure! We’re pretty good about narrowing down our extracurricular activities for our kids (it also helps when the pandemic cancels most things—silver lining!) But I can’t wait to implement some of these ideas!
I feel that a lot of the problem is feeling that we’ll have “so much” free time on the weekends but when you subtract church, grocery shopping, daily household chores, etc it’s really not a ton of extra time so we have to be very protective of that time.
Andrea says
I agree — I think we go into the weekends thinking “3 free days” because everyone equates Friday to the “weekend” but really it’s only 2 days and those 2 days still have sleeping, eating, church, etc. to work around (which takes up about half the time) so we really do need to be purposeful and “protective” as you put it of our few “free” weekend hours!
Thanks for sharing!
Margaret says
I’m on the flip side of this now. Pre-retirement, I had to work every other weekend, and I crouched over my free weekend like a tiger with a fresh kill. I did enjoy using the time for meal prep and laundry, but I always tried to get the laundry done on Friday (our night-shift weekend was Friday/Saturday, back to work Sunday night), would go to the farmers’ market on Saturday to get my food, and then did meal prep Sunday morning. I spent the rest of the time chilling, and would get pretty resentful at other demands on my time.
Now that I’m in a life stage where I don’t need to protect that time off I’m all of the sudden very willing to volunteer for dog club stuff. In the last couple of months several weekends have gone for stewarding at agility and nosework trials, plus I’ve shown my own dog in Obedience (finished her CD, if anyone would like to know…), and this weekend will steward a Newfoundland Draft Test. I know it will slow down in the winter due to COVID restrictions, but it has been fun, and it surprises me how much I want to do it now. Life does change.
Amazing how much more time a person has when you take a full-time job out of the equation.
Andrea says
yay — enjoy your retirement! so fun that you can now do more volunteer stuff and pursue other hobbies. enjoy this season of life!
Sarah says
Once again excellent motivating advice!!!! Thank you!
Andrea says
Thanks so much 🙂